Guide To Better Living · Health · Lifestyle

Slow – Living

Sometimes, I worry that I am not setting enough challenging goals for myself and as such not achieving as much as I could especially financially – and then such thought sends me into a heated effort to up my ante and push harder.

Then, I realize that what gets the better of me is that when I get caught by this bug, I go into overdrive and oftentimes, I end up setting too many goals and exorbitant expectations to match them; all with good intentions, but I tend to fail in following through when out of the blues, life chooses to start lifing and things then get overwhelming.

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I am nudged with the fact that I am getting older and that if I don’t have certain ducks set in a row soon, that would be that, and I will be left clutching feathers. It is not that the thought is giving me sleepless nights, now and again, it simply feels like a hard knot sitting in my throat.

I am naturally a multitasker but recently, I chose to start practicing single-tasking as well as slow-living in most aspects of my life, where possible. Unfortunately, the exigency of paid employment makes it unaffordable to practice the 100 % slow-living approach. Nonetheless, consciously choosing to be intentional, to calm down and not rev my engine as hard and as furious as before, is proving to be far more helpful and even more productive than before.

My business right now is to really to strike the right balance and harmony in everything that concerns my life by focusing on quality over quantity, mindfully enjoying the present moment, prioritizing my values and experiences. Embracing this slower paced lifestyle has increased my sense of well-being, reduced my feelings of anxiety, helping me to cultivate a deeper connection with God and the world around me.

I’m finding that the case of ‘not how fast, but how far’ stands true and possibly wins with time.

Life · Lifestyle · Philosophy of Life

A pinch of gratitude, a basket of grace.

A little gratitude can do lots of wonders for your overall wellbeing.

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Though it’s not always easy, being grateful for the positives in life can have a profound impact on your life. Consistently showing gratitude can be surprisingly difficult as many of us get caught up in the negativity bias, where we linger on bad news, unpleasant experiences, and allowing moments of positivity and good things to fade into the background.

Fortunately, gratitude is like a muscle that you can build. With the right approach and practice, you can find at least something small to appreciate even on the bleakest of days.

Gratitude is a way for us to appreciate what we have, instead of always reaching for something new in the hope to be happier, or thinking that we can’t feel satisfied until every physical and material need is met.

Gratitude helps us refocus on what we have instead of what we lack. And, although it may feel pretentious initially, this mental state grows stronger with practice till it becomes a way of life.

Approaching life with a more positive mindset has cascading benefits in every area of your life.

Indeed, a grateful heart finds in every hour, some heavenly blessings to relish.

Just A Thought · kindness · Lifestyle

It’s the most wonderful time…

I love this time of the year; yes indeed, it could be the most wonderful time of the year for a whole lot of people – but truth be told, this statement might not hold the same sentiments for everyone out there due to personal reasons. However, that’s not what my post is about.

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I totally love the Christmas season not only as a firm believer and practicing Christain, but I also love the gaiety, the cooler atmosphere, the sense of wholesomeness et al. Nevertheless, this is one of the seasons that I find financially stressful where I find myself struggling to make the frayed ends meet and to satisfy certain obligations which entails buying meaningful and useful gifts, travel, upkeep etcetera.

Trying to choose the right gifts of family, friends, colleagues can become tedious especially when the money math is not mathing as it should, and you are struggling to ensure that you get something that they would appreciate and use. In all honesty, this year I simply decided that I would not go overboard with all the Christmas do’s and to keep things as simple as I possibly could.

I started making my purchases a bit earlier by not leaving my shopping to the last minute and from September I was adding gift items to my budget and sourcing for bargains/shopping deals. This approach has been immensely helpful. It was not only about the economics of things, but it is timesaving, less of a headache and allows one to exhale.

No matter how you are spending your Christmas – with loved ones, alone – or not at all, I wish you great compliments of the season and hope that we don’t lose sight of the reason for the season and stay kind to each other.

Lifestyle · Reading · Writing

Never played favourites…

@beyondexisting.j

Born a crime Trevor Noah #reading #hobby #trevornoah #Ilovereading #books #fypシ゚viral #passion #favouritethings #bookreview #bookrecommendations Trevor Noah’s book is a gritty, hilarious and poignant memoir that shares his experiences growing up in a racially charged Apartheid South Africa. A delightful read that evoked every emotion in me.#CapCut

♬ Commando – Mavokali

I find such questions like ‘who is your favourite author and why‘ truly mundane and it almost seems as if eclectic, voracious readers like me are strange. I had to give this a hard thought and sadly came up short in choosing a favourite fiction, non-fiction author or writer.

Again like colors’, it makes me wonder why I can’t simply be simple in my choices and just pick a name. I usually don’t sit on the fence when it comes to voicing my opinion even if it is a dissenting thought and I can be a bit too straightforward in saying what I think or feel.

I love reading and when I was pretty young, I stuck with my Enid Blyton’s and my teenage years were spent reading uncountable numbers of Harlequins, Mill & Boons, Hadley Chase, Tom Clancy, Mark Twain, Ernest Hemingway and many more.

My reading tastes has been generally diversified and having taken an in-depth look at why this might be so, I have arrived at the conclusion that it is because I like multiple things, I see the world from multiple perspective, that I am a pluralist and many things are good and not just a singular thing.

I also see that liking different things will ultimately improves my social life and that’s fine not to fit into a mould clustering around any particular taste. Liking multiple things makes me, me.

Without trying to sound proud, I think that a wide taste in reading is a sign of intelligence, of intellectual curiosity, open mindedness, and a willingness to absorb new ideas.

Sometimes, I find that though a lot of people can be extremely intelligent but have very closed minds but the love of all kinds of literary genres implies the love of creativity, of actively seeking out new approaches and ideas and the ability to appreciate different paradigms.

Blogging · Life · Lifestyle · writing challenge

A state of equilibrium…

In all sincerity, I can’t recollect any specific day so far that I can count on as the happiest day of my life. On my wedding day, I think I was a bit anxious about my guests having a good time and hoping that the wedding ceremony goes as well as planned to classify it as my happiest day. In retrospect, if I had to redo my wedding, I would do things a whole differently and have less crowd.

I have come to see happiness as a state of mind that persists in one’s life based on several factors such as being present and finding peace and joy in the moments that we have and not a temporary product of a specific event. As such, I work consistently to maintain as much level of contentment, fulfilment, joy and satisfaction as I possibly can by eliminating negativity and negative energy, by staying positive and doing those things that bring me that sense of happiness.

I have experienced great moments of joy when I gave birth to my babies, a sense of fulfillment when I published my books and beautiful memories of sublime moments with family and friends but there’s no singular day in life that I can pinpoint as the happiest day in my life. It is still non-existent, but who knows, maybe sometime soon in the near future such a day will come.

@beyondexisting.j

Feel good. Joy in small things. #fyp #positivevibes #bejoyful #butterfly #friday beyondexisting.j #fp

♬ Calm Down – Rema
Just A Thought · kindness · Life · Lifestyle

Choosing Lavender…

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Already! It’s the end of a work week here. Hardly did the alarm go off on Sunday morning, and now here we are; it’s Thursday. Hey Presto!… and the hours spill into days and the days into weeks and months and the year is almost gone.

Before you know it, 1 year is gone, and next and the next… With each cycle of time, we turn a new age, from 20 to 30 to 40, to 50, 60, 70 years old and so on if life is kind to you. Years lived and days passed. As we take stock of all the years gone by, we realize how much we have gained and lost as well. With the passage of time, some of us have expanded sideways and gained some wisdom ‘hopefully’… We have lost loved ones and as much as we would like most things in our life to stay stable, sadly we can never turn back the hands of time.

I remember my teenage years of hot pants, pedal-pushers, minis and what-not and the firm perkiness of my body parts, no extra folds and rolls, and non-creaky achy parts. Those yesteryears when I thought 30 was old… What my young mind did not conceive then was the need to ensure that I truly enjoyed and appreciated those moments. That I would one day look back with deep-seated nostalgia and sense of loss never occurred to me.

Now, as older years loom ahead, we must, despite all the ups and downs of life, learn to enjoy the time that we have. Let’s immerse ourselves in doing those things that bring us and those around us joy, laughter, peace, calm, hope and prosperity. Learning to leave rancour, undue stress, grudges, worry and all those negative thoughts, emotions and actions that don’t add a jot of value to our lives is a valuable strength. Put some colour in the greys of your days and don’t keep waiting for the right time or a party to wear that beautiful lavender dress of yours. BE The Party! Find the Zest even when it seems evasive. You will be better for it.

Let’s smile at the little things and let the joy and serenity derived from such feeling sooth our bruised souls. There are so many lost moments and broken dreams in afterwards. Even when we are blessed with longevity, life is a short trip.

Life can’t be lived in the afterwards, ‘cos priorities will always change. Afterwards, the momentary charm gets broken. Afterwards, our offspring grow up, we age and our parents get older. Afterwards, health passes and promises get forgotten. Afterwards, our vigour diminishes, the days become less and life eventually ends. Let’s stop waiting for later, ‘cos in doing so we lose the best moments, the best experiences, best friends, the best family that life has to offer. We are no longer at that youthful age where we believe we have the time to postpone what needs to be done in the immediate.

When you are young, getting older might look an eternity, but eternity is most certainly a short trip.

Enjoy Your Life, Be Kind to Yourself and Others. Peace be with you!

Good Ideas · Guide To Better Living · Lifestyle

Embracing change…

Most of us who have hit 40 and beyond have most times become hardwired in our ways that change does not come easy and is often worse than pulling teeth, however, if we fail to embrace change both internally and externally we will slowly decay, grow out of touch with times and very well become stubborn, doddering old coots. 

Some may say that after all, we are not going to live forever nor get out here alive – they do have a point – so why bother to keep up with change? There are boundless reasons why change is not only good for your body and soul, your mental health, your business – whatever that may be – and it may not only elongate your life but perhaps make your life more interesting and ‘you’ a less of a stubborn doddering old coot 😉 Change quote, Challenge, Life, Pushing Forward, Inspiration, My Thinking Corner

We know that change is constant and even when we don’t seek it, it is thrust on us that we are not left much choice; you either fight it to a bitter finish, or you embrace it with flourish. The choice is yours.

The many benefits derived from change range from:

Personal growth: you will learn new things, discover new insights and perspectives every time you experience some change. Sometimes the outcomes and lessons learned may not be your initial expectation and could be much better.

Improvements: No situation in our life improves by itself without making the necessary adjustments; be it our finances, health, job, relationship, home…We need to take those vital steps required to improve that circumstance that we are struggling with because without making the effort things will continue to stagnate.

Life values: Mere looking at the present conditions of our existence and how a pandemic has made most people reevaluate their lives and reinforce those important life values is an easy example. From time to time we need to assess our values.

Flexibility: Embracing change helps us adapt easily to new situations and even thrive whilst at it. We become far more supple.

Ripple effect: Making big changes in one swoop is extremely difficult, but taking those little steps of change surely lead to bigger ones and hopefully better results.

Strength: A lot of change comes with attendant challenges and overcoming them only makes us tougher.

Progress: Progress is the child of change. Your vehicle will most certainly not move forward when the gear is constantly in neutral. To get where you want to be, be prepared to change the gear and move forward.

Opportunities: Change brings opportunities – both expected and unexpected – and they could present you more fulfilment, happiness and growth. To illustrate, nearly two years ago I flipped my career pursuit and started a journey in the educational sector where I started out teaching French in a new school here in the UAE and within a short space of time, I was promoted to a head of the section. My initial goal was to keep my French sharp and not lose it the way I have lost speaking Spanish, here I am now, not knowing for sure where the ride is going but enjoying it and hoping to make the best of it all the way.

Exciting New beginnings: Change brings that much-desired excitement that we need in our lives. It puts a spring in your step when you close a chapter that should have been closed way back and open a new one that leads to greater things.

A more interesting life: What would life be when it becomes one monotonous, boring and uninteresting routine? As dull as dishwater. Resist that temptation to stick to predictability all the time and aim to initiate little self-evolving steps of change that will lead you where you need to be.

Enjoy the butterflies!

 

Gratitude · Guide To Better Living · Health · Lifestyle

What Will You Accomplish This Year?…

I took a second look at this blog that I started at the beginning of the year before COVID came to town, and I realized that some of the things I had wanted to achieve almost bordered on ‘being vain.’

I rewrite my list and wish as below…

  1. Staying Alive… that will be top of my list.
  2. Loving and showing more love to those around me.
  3. Being thankful and grateful for each day and the opportunities that I have.
  4. Staying in touch with loved ones near and far.
  5. Giving more of me – ‘cos there’s an ample lot of me to give 😉
  6. Quitting the complaining and worrying less.
  7. Staying hopeful that ‘all things will work out for my good’
  8. Focusing on the absolutely necessary
  9. Laughing a lot more than I am at present.
  10. Dancing a little each day.
  11. Applying the 2-minute rule in trying to get things done. (I will expand this further in another post).
  12. Eat healthier meals and savour every bite.
  13. Taking back charge of my blogging and writing.
  14. Keeping the right momentum with my studies and getting my homework done on time.
  15. Approach change and challenges with a positive mind.
  16. Stop letting the thoughts of financial struggle dominate every breath that I take.

I refuse to continue to mount pressure on myself and guilt trip myself over the failure to achieve all the high-achieving goals that I had on my previous list. It doesn’t mean that I am settling for less, rather I am pressing the ‘REFRESH’ button and allowing myself to exhale in order to inhale better.

See you around.

© Jacqueline

By the way, what was on your list?

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Cooking · food · Lifestyle

Tomatoes, tomatoes, to buy some fresh things….

For several weeks now, I’ve been more adventurous with food and have been paying extra attention to eating generous portions of fresh fruits and veggies more than I possibly did last year and I must say that I see good results ‘cos my skin certainly feels clearer and my bowels happier 🙂

While foraging for my weeks’ supply, I ran into these luscious Riccio Fiorentino tomatoes in the organic section and was certainly attracted to them due to their deep red colour and their trademark ridges. I do love eating tomatoes and learnt to juice and eat them fresh like my daddy, however, I certainly balk at spending a king’s ransom on vegetables.

I thought I could just buy a kilo or two but was forced to drop them like hot potatoes when after it was weighed the cost of my 6 tomatoes was enough to buy me my entire basket of vegetables for the week.  I felt a bit disappointed and settled for my regular everyday tomatoes all the while thinking of the sweet, rich flavour of those beauties.

Am I the only one who feels that the prices of these organic products are most times irritatingly exorbitant and exaggerated?

Lifestyle · Parenting

Finding Fabulous Fulfillment For Yourself After Having A Little One

You aren’t afraid to admit that your entire life revolves around your new baby. You have lost all concepts of who you were before you had the little one and you don’t want it to affect your self-esteem in the long run. Being a new mom is full of challenges, so you need to keep in touch with the person you have always been, otherwise, you will drive yourself crazy. Whether you’re trying to impress your spouse by furthering your career or you just want to give yourself a little boost of confidence, there are so many ways to feel fulfilled without compromising the important things in life. Consider all of the following ideas and you will soon be able to find contentment amongst the hectic life of having a newborn.

Pursue Your Passions

You should never give up on pursuing your passions, even when you have had a child. Your career and studies might have to go on hold for a short period of time whilst you adjust to life with a little one, but there is nothing stopping you from achieving your goals eventually. You might want to start with taking an online course which will help you enhance your career one day. Whether it’s an MBA with engineering focus or a business management degree that will help you to start your own company one day, you will be able to find the ideal solution for you, without compromising on the important time with your new baby.

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Reconnect with Friends

When you have a child it is very easy to lose touch with people who were once very important to you. Reconnecting with your friends and maintaining those strong relationships is very important for your own sanity. You will regret ignoring your best friend for the first few years of your child’s life because one day you might really need to lean on them for support. Schedule regular catch ups with your close companions and you will never feel out of the loop or lonely.

Take Care of Yourself

Find little pockets of time throughout the day to give yourself that little bit of tender loving care. Whether it’s a hot bubble bath whilst the baby is sleeping or you meditate for half an hour first thing in the morning, there are so many ways to practise self-care. These small moments are precious and will help you to keep your sanity during a hectic day. A pamper session once a month will also help you to feel fabulous.

Find the Perfect Balance

Whatever your personal goals are, you should always strive for the perfect balance. You can do it all, whether you’re chasing a career whilst taking care of a baby or furthering your studies in between motherhood. Find an equilibrium that helps you to conquer all the elements that you love and you will always be content in your life.

Although your little one means the world to you, you must never forget about yourself and what you want to achieve in life. As long as you strike a balance between the two you will always be happy and comfortable with all of your decisions in life.