Lifestyle · Reading · Writing

Never played favourites…

@beyondexisting.j

Born a crime Trevor Noah #reading #hobby #trevornoah #Ilovereading #books #fypシ゚viral #passion #favouritethings #bookreview #bookrecommendations Trevor Noah’s book is a gritty, hilarious and poignant memoir that shares his experiences growing up in a racially charged Apartheid South Africa. A delightful read that evoked every emotion in me.#CapCut

♬ Commando – Mavokali

I find such questions like ‘who is your favourite author and why‘ truly mundane and it almost seems as if eclectic, voracious readers like me are strange. I had to give this a hard thought and sadly came up short in choosing a favourite fiction, non-fiction author or writer.

Again like colors’, it makes me wonder why I can’t simply be simple in my choices and just pick a name. I usually don’t sit on the fence when it comes to voicing my opinion even if it is a dissenting thought and I can be a bit too straightforward in saying what I think or feel.

I love reading and when I was pretty young, I stuck with my Enid Blyton’s and my teenage years were spent reading uncountable numbers of Harlequins, Mill & Boons, Hadley Chase, Tom Clancy, Mark Twain, Ernest Hemingway and many more.

My reading tastes has been generally diversified and having taken an in-depth look at why this might be so, I have arrived at the conclusion that it is because I like multiple things, I see the world from multiple perspective, that I am a pluralist and many things are good and not just a singular thing.

I also see that liking different things will ultimately improves my social life and that’s fine not to fit into a mould clustering around any particular taste. Liking multiple things makes me, me.

Without trying to sound proud, I think that a wide taste in reading is a sign of intelligence, of intellectual curiosity, open mindedness, and a willingness to absorb new ideas.

Sometimes, I find that though a lot of people can be extremely intelligent but have very closed minds but the love of all kinds of literary genres implies the love of creativity, of actively seeking out new approaches and ideas and the ability to appreciate different paradigms.

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Blogging · Life · Lifestyle · writing challenge

A state of equilibrium…

In all sincerity, I can’t recollect any specific day so far that I can count on as the happiest day of my life. On my wedding day, I think I was a bit anxious about my guests having a good time and hoping that the wedding ceremony goes as well as planned to classify it as my happiest day. In retrospect, if I had to redo my wedding, I would do things a whole differently and have less crowd.

I have come to see happiness as a state of mind that persists in one’s life based on several factors such as being present and finding peace and joy in the moments that we have and not a temporary product of a specific event. As such, I work consistently to maintain as much level of contentment, fulfilment, joy and satisfaction as I possibly can by eliminating negativity and negative energy, by staying positive and doing those things that bring me that sense of happiness.

I have experienced great moments of joy when I gave birth to my babies, a sense of fulfillment when I published my books and beautiful memories of sublime moments with family and friends but there’s no singular day in life that I can pinpoint as the happiest day in my life. It is still non-existent, but who knows, maybe sometime soon in the near future such a day will come.

@beyondexisting.j

Feel good. Joy in small things. #fyp #positivevibes #bejoyful #butterfly #friday beyondexisting.j #fp

♬ Calm Down – Rema
Just A Thought · kindness · Life · Lifestyle

Choosing Lavender…

Photo by Natasha Fernandez on Pexels.com

Already! It’s the end of a work week here. Hardly did the alarm go off on Sunday morning, and now here we are; it’s Thursday. Hey Presto!… and the hours spill into days and the days into weeks and months and the year is almost gone.

Before you know it, 1 year is gone, and next and the next… With each cycle of time, we turn a new age, from 20 to 30 to 40, to 50, 60, 70 years old and so on if life is kind to you. Years lived and days passed. As we take stock of all the years gone by, we realize how much we have gained and lost as well. With the passage of time, some of us have expanded sideways and gained some wisdom ‘hopefully’… We have lost loved ones and as much as we would like most things in our life to stay stable, sadly we can never turn back the hands of time.

I remember my teenage years of hot pants, pedal-pushers, minis and what-not and the firm perkiness of my body parts, no extra folds and rolls, and non-creaky achy parts. Those yesteryears when I thought 30 was old… What my young mind did not conceive then was the need to ensure that I truly enjoyed and appreciated those moments. That I would one day look back with deep-seated nostalgia and sense of loss never occurred to me.

Now, as older years loom ahead, we must, despite all the ups and downs of life, learn to enjoy the time that we have. Let’s immerse ourselves in doing those things that bring us and those around us joy, laughter, peace, calm, hope and prosperity. Learning to leave rancour, undue stress, grudges, worry and all those negative thoughts, emotions and actions that don’t add a jot of value to our lives is a valuable strength. Put some colour in the greys of your days and don’t keep waiting for the right time or a party to wear that beautiful lavender dress of yours. BE The Party! Find the Zest even when it seems evasive. You will be better for it.

Let’s smile at the little things and let the joy and serenity derived from such feeling sooth our bruised souls. There are so many lost moments and broken dreams in afterwards. Even when we are blessed with longevity, life is a short trip.

Life can’t be lived in the afterwards, ‘cos priorities will always change. Afterwards, the momentary charm gets broken. Afterwards, our offspring grow up, we age and our parents get older. Afterwards, health passes and promises get forgotten. Afterwards, our vigour diminishes, the days become less and life eventually ends. Let’s stop waiting for later, ‘cos in doing so we lose the best moments, the best experiences, best friends, the best family that life has to offer. We are no longer at that youthful age where we believe we have the time to postpone what needs to be done in the immediate.

When you are young, getting older might look an eternity, but eternity is most certainly a short trip.

Enjoy Your Life, Be Kind to Yourself and Others. Peace be with you!

Good Ideas · Guide To Better Living · Lifestyle

Embracing change…

Most of us who have hit 40 and beyond have most times become hardwired in our ways that change does not come easy and is often worse than pulling teeth, however, if we fail to embrace change both internally and externally we will slowly decay, grow out of touch with times and very well become stubborn, doddering old coots. 

Some may say that after all, we are not going to live forever nor get out here alive – they do have a point – so why bother to keep up with change? There are boundless reasons why change is not only good for your body and soul, your mental health, your business – whatever that may be – and it may not only elongate your life but perhaps make your life more interesting and ‘you’ a less of a stubborn doddering old coot 😉 Change quote, Challenge, Life, Pushing Forward, Inspiration, My Thinking Corner

We know that change is constant and even when we don’t seek it, it is thrust on us that we are not left much choice; you either fight it to a bitter finish, or you embrace it with flourish. The choice is yours.

The many benefits derived from change range from:

Personal growth: you will learn new things, discover new insights and perspectives every time you experience some change. Sometimes the outcomes and lessons learned may not be your initial expectation and could be much better.

Improvements: No situation in our life improves by itself without making the necessary adjustments; be it our finances, health, job, relationship, home…We need to take those vital steps required to improve that circumstance that we are struggling with because without making the effort things will continue to stagnate.

Life values: Mere looking at the present conditions of our existence and how a pandemic has made most people reevaluate their lives and reinforce those important life values is an easy example. From time to time we need to assess our values.

Flexibility: Embracing change helps us adapt easily to new situations and even thrive whilst at it. We become far more supple.

Ripple effect: Making big changes in one swoop is extremely difficult, but taking those little steps of change surely lead to bigger ones and hopefully better results.

Strength: A lot of change comes with attendant challenges and overcoming them only makes us tougher.

Progress: Progress is the child of change. Your vehicle will most certainly not move forward when the gear is constantly in neutral. To get where you want to be, be prepared to change the gear and move forward.

Opportunities: Change brings opportunities – both expected and unexpected – and they could present you more fulfilment, happiness and growth. To illustrate, nearly two years ago I flipped my career pursuit and started a journey in the educational sector where I started out teaching French in a new school here in the UAE and within a short space of time, I was promoted to a head of the section. My initial goal was to keep my French sharp and not lose it the way I have lost speaking Spanish, here I am now, not knowing for sure where the ride is going but enjoying it and hoping to make the best of it all the way.

Exciting New beginnings: Change brings that much-desired excitement that we need in our lives. It puts a spring in your step when you close a chapter that should have been closed way back and open a new one that leads to greater things.

A more interesting life: What would life be when it becomes one monotonous, boring and uninteresting routine? As dull as dishwater. Resist that temptation to stick to predictability all the time and aim to initiate little self-evolving steps of change that will lead you where you need to be.

Enjoy the butterflies!

 

Gratitude · Guide To Better Living · Health · Lifestyle

What Will You Accomplish This Year?…

I took a second look at this blog that I started at the beginning of the year before COVID came to town, and I realized that some of the things I had wanted to achieve almost bordered on ‘being vain.’

I rewrite my list and wish as below…

  1. Staying Alive… that will be top of my list.
  2. Loving and showing more love to those around me.
  3. Being thankful and grateful for each day and the opportunities that I have.
  4. Staying in touch with loved ones near and far.
  5. Giving more of me – ‘cos there’s an ample lot of me to give 😉
  6. Quitting the complaining and worrying less.
  7. Staying hopeful that ‘all things will work out for my good’
  8. Focusing on the absolutely necessary
  9. Laughing a lot more than I am at present.
  10. Dancing a little each day.
  11. Applying the 2-minute rule in trying to get things done. (I will expand this further in another post).
  12. Eat healthier meals and savour every bite.
  13. Taking back charge of my blogging and writing.
  14. Keeping the right momentum with my studies and getting my homework done on time.
  15. Approach change and challenges with a positive mind.
  16. Stop letting the thoughts of financial struggle dominate every breath that I take.

I refuse to continue to mount pressure on myself and guilt trip myself over the failure to achieve all the high-achieving goals that I had on my previous list. It doesn’t mean that I am settling for less, rather I am pressing the ‘REFRESH’ button and allowing myself to exhale in order to inhale better.

See you around.

© Jacqueline

By the way, what was on your list?

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Cooking · food · Lifestyle

Tomatoes, tomatoes, to buy some fresh things….

For several weeks now, I’ve been more adventurous with food and have been paying extra attention to eating generous portions of fresh fruits and veggies more than I possibly did last year and I must say that I see good results ‘cos my skin certainly feels clearer and my bowels happier 🙂

While foraging for my weeks’ supply, I ran into these luscious Riccio Fiorentino tomatoes in the organic section and was certainly attracted to them due to their deep red colour and their trademark ridges. I do love eating tomatoes and learnt to juice and eat them fresh like my daddy, however, I certainly balk at spending a king’s ransom on vegetables.

I thought I could just buy a kilo or two but was forced to drop them like hot potatoes when after it was weighed the cost of my 6 tomatoes was enough to buy me my entire basket of vegetables for the week.  I felt a bit disappointed and settled for my regular everyday tomatoes all the while thinking of the sweet, rich flavour of those beauties.

Am I the only one who feels that the prices of these organic products are most times irritatingly exorbitant and exaggerated?

Lifestyle · Parenting

Finding Fabulous Fulfillment For Yourself After Having A Little One

You aren’t afraid to admit that your entire life revolves around your new baby. You have lost all concepts of who you were before you had the little one and you don’t want it to affect your self-esteem in the long run. Being a new mom is full of challenges, so you need to keep in touch with the person you have always been, otherwise, you will drive yourself crazy. Whether you’re trying to impress your spouse by furthering your career or you just want to give yourself a little boost of confidence, there are so many ways to feel fulfilled without compromising the important things in life. Consider all of the following ideas and you will soon be able to find contentment amongst the hectic life of having a newborn.

Pursue Your Passions

You should never give up on pursuing your passions, even when you have had a child. Your career and studies might have to go on hold for a short period of time whilst you adjust to life with a little one, but there is nothing stopping you from achieving your goals eventually. You might want to start with taking an online course which will help you enhance your career one day. Whether it’s an MBA with engineering focus or a business management degree that will help you to start your own company one day, you will be able to find the ideal solution for you, without compromising on the important time with your new baby.

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Reconnect with Friends

When you have a child it is very easy to lose touch with people who were once very important to you. Reconnecting with your friends and maintaining those strong relationships is very important for your own sanity. You will regret ignoring your best friend for the first few years of your child’s life because one day you might really need to lean on them for support. Schedule regular catch ups with your close companions and you will never feel out of the loop or lonely.

Take Care of Yourself

Find little pockets of time throughout the day to give yourself that little bit of tender loving care. Whether it’s a hot bubble bath whilst the baby is sleeping or you meditate for half an hour first thing in the morning, there are so many ways to practise self-care. These small moments are precious and will help you to keep your sanity during a hectic day. A pamper session once a month will also help you to feel fabulous.

Find the Perfect Balance

Whatever your personal goals are, you should always strive for the perfect balance. You can do it all, whether you’re chasing a career whilst taking care of a baby or furthering your studies in between motherhood. Find an equilibrium that helps you to conquer all the elements that you love and you will always be content in your life.

Although your little one means the world to you, you must never forget about yourself and what you want to achieve in life. As long as you strike a balance between the two you will always be happy and comfortable with all of your decisions in life.

Fashion · How To · Lifestyle

Boobs, Breasts and Bras…

Yes, you read the topic ‘boobs, breasts and bras,’ correctly. This is a little chit-chat about your bosom buddies and they are nothing to fear or dread. Being a woman, you can’t disassociate from parts of you that accentuate your femininity and if you’re like most women, you know your breasts intimately – their ups and downs, how they fit into your bras, the way they look in certain dresses, what they feel like at different times of the month and perhaps if you are getting on in age, the changes they go through as the law of gravity helps them head downhill.

Interestingly, it took me getting to the ripe old age of my 30’s to get comfortable with my gals, and I attribute our delay in getting to know each other well to two main things: frustrating bra shopping escapades and lack of better insight on how to find the right kind of bras for me.

As odd as it might sound, choosing the right bra for your shape and size isn’t always that easy, and sadly, most women find the experience to be such an ordeal that sometimes after scouring through dozens of bras, sweating, huffing and puffing in the changing room, you end up leaving the store with nothing at all, or sometimes you leave with a bra that’s entirely wrong for you, which I presume is worse.

For those of us who have been well endowed in the upper chambers of boobs department, finding comfortable, yet beautiful and efficient bras that help to support our buddies and boost their confidence is truly a path to wellness and peace of mind. I vividly recall my last months’ foray into a well-known top brand store that I shall keep a secret, every bra – even though they were meant to be my attributed size – left me thinking that I had supplementary breasts and by the end of the frustrating escapade I’m not sure who felt more pained between the attendant and me. The whole experience left me feeling like an elephant trying to wear fripperies and negligees and I couldn’t help venting a little on my Facebook update.

Following my little update, a friend sent me the image below which not only made me chuckle, but made me realize that the journey of the bras is a common denominator among women and with my tongue in my cheek, I dare ask, which illustration matches your predicament?

I have reached an age where I am no longer going to part with my money for flimsies that don’t uphold me no matter how pretty they look. In search of great, high quality bras with good support, I have abandoned those infernal underwire cups that most times leave you feeling pinched, caged in and out of breath. Let the truth be told, at a certain age, the law of gravity brings the perkiness of your boobs down by several notches and though you don’t want to look ridiculous trying to push your boobs up to the high heavens, you equally don’t want them dangling to your knees. What you want is the right upliftment of comfy, beautiful and supportive bras that will treat your bosom buddies right.

Quick Tips on How to Make Bra Shopping Less of a Pain

  • It pays to know your size. To find your bust size, measure around your ribs just under your breasts and measure around the fullest part of your breasts. Subtract the band measurement (ribs) from the bust measurement to get your cup size.
  • Make sure that your entire breasts are in the cup, not spilling over or to the sides.
  • Check that the straps are not digging into or sliding off your shoulders.
  • The centerpiece between the two cups should lay flat on your sternum.
  • The thicker the band, the more support you will get.
  • Be patient and have fun with it.
Guide To Better Living · life skills · Lifestyle

The Real Meaning Behind Working Hard

People all over the world will tell you that “working hard” is a piece of advice to take with a grain of salt. It’s not exactly clear why they think that (and sometimes they fail to understand it themselves) so let’s take a dive into the meaning of working hard and why everyone should do it – at least to a certain extent.

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Having Endurance

Hard work doesn’t just mean putting in a little effort to reach your goals. Hard work means enduring a journey of effort, pain and occasionally misfortune. It’s all about having that endurance to keep working hard throughout your life and never giving up.

It’s one of the most desirable qualities in people. Having that endurance to keep on working longer than others will put you at an advantage and ultimately make you more successful than others. If success is measured in the amount of time you put into something, then those with more endurance can ultimately last longer.

However, it doesn’t mean pushing yourself to a point where you physically collapse. There are some people that are perfectly capable of working long hours and putting in more effort, and it’s ultimately down to how much pleasure you get from putting in an extra effort and going the extra mile to see better results than people who are lazy and have put less time into their dreams.

You Define Hard Work

You’ll occasionally see hypocrites telling you that hard work is X or Y, and they’ll say that their definition of hard work is the be-all-end-all. However, you’ll find that they rarely ever meet their requirements of “hard work” and they’re just blowing steam.

Don’t listen to these types of people. You will define hard work by your own measurements. Some people consider it working themselves until they’re physically tired, while others consider it completing a task with plenty of time left to spare. Entrepreneurs might consider hard work to be making more profit than their projected numbers, and artists might consider hard work as being able to stay consistent.

Define hard work yourself–don’t let someone do it for you.

The Problem with Overworking

One of the reasons why people say that hard work is bad is due to overworking. If you find that you’re never given a break and that your employer is constantly pushing you, then this lawyer here can help you get a break before you injure yourself. The idea is to constantly try and push your limits so you can discover what you’re really capable of, but you should also keep in mind that you shouldn’t overwork yourself to the point you’re hurting your body and mind.

Hard work is important and it carries a different meaning from person to person. However, you need to remember to always take breaks and let yourself relax both physically and mentally. Hard work and success are long-term marathons that take endurance, not sprints that are over in a few seconds!

This is a collaborative post.
Lifestyle · Travel

Sprawling Cities That You Need To Visit

Sao Paulo, Brazil, Skyline, Travel
Picture Source

The mind-boggling skyline of São Paulo stretches further than the eye can see.

As a traveller, you’re always looking for new experiences. You might be used to hopping from destination to destination, so you want to find a place to explore that’s a little more substantial. Well, rather than navigating your way through the winding maze of some beautiful jungle, maybe you should navigate your way through a manmade jungle instead. In this article, we’re going to talk about some of the world’s biggest and most exciting cities. You won’t run out of things to see and do in these destinations.

São Paulo, Brazil

As the picture above clearly shows, the city of São Paulo is ginormous. And packed into this sprawling city is a lot of culture and fantastic pieces of architecture. If you’re completely blown away by the picture of this spectacular skyline then you should book accommodation at the Marriott Executive Apartments in São Paulo so that you’re able to stay in a luxurious hotel that provides brilliant views of the city.

Additionally, you want to be within walking distance of the fantastic restaurants and other sights in the area. You should visit the São Paulo Museum of Art, first of all. Not only is it a stunning building in its own right, but there are lots of wonderful galleries to admire within this huge building. You should also check out the Monument to the Bandeiras; it’s not only a fantastic sculpture but a celebration of the explorers known as bandeiras who settled in the heart of Brazil centuries ago.

Los Angeles, U.S.

When it comes to sprawling cities, L.A. is one of the best destinations to put on your bucket list. It’s one of the most popular tourist destinations in America for a good reason. For starters, you should explore Hollywood. Whilst it’s a very different place behind the scenes, that’s part of what makes it so fascinating. And if you head up the Hollywood Hills on a mini-expedition then you’ll be able to admire the entirety of L.A.’s beautiful skyline from a great height.

You should head to the Griffith Observatory whilst you’re up there. It’s a beautiful building that provides a beautiful view of the city (there’s also a fantastic telescope that gives you a view of the stars). Still, this is only the tip of what Los Angeles has to offer. Head to Grand Central Market downtown for some of the best food in the city. Not only are there fantastic dining spots in this sprawling market but there’s often wonderful live music too. The point is that Los Angeles is huge, and there’s a lot to explore in its depths.

Singapore

When it comes to huge cities, Singapore probably wins the challenge out of the destinations on this list. It’s so huge that it’s more than a city, in fact; it’s an island country. But we’re including it on the list anyway, as it is a city of sorts (it’s just an overwhelmingly large city). This multicultural haven is a paradise for any keen traveller.

You should try out the Peranakan cuisine whilst you’re in the city; it’s a delicious combination of Chinese and Malay dishes. The gorgeous Gardens by the Bay are well worth seeing too. This fantastic manmade structure takes you on an elevated walk through some of the stunning waterfront gardens that Singapore has to offer. It’s the very definition of garden artistry.