For those who may be unable to make out the inscription on the photo:
Greetings from Koobi Fiora/Lake Rudolf April 1965
a cooking pot and twisted tales
Thoughts and Tales…A Lifestyle Blog with a Zing.
For those who may be unable to make out the inscription on the photo:
Greetings from Koobi Fiora/Lake Rudolf April 1965
People crave for a revolution
‘cos they’ve been let down by malevolence
and forsaken by the benevolence
of convoluted governance
The journey through a revolution
most times leaves a devolved nation
riddled with woes and horrifying history
yet evolution is a must, ‘cos life is forever in a flux.
So, we march onto tomorrows evolution
leaving the frivolous tendencies of the past
hoping that in a nonvolatile manner
we guarantee a better future for our progeny.
I write this poem above for many Nations going through the pains of bad leadership and especially my home country Nigeria, which has been a boiling pot.
I am Nigerian by birth. From the Igbo tribe and I am Biafran. Over decades, the Igbo’s have been marginalized in the convoluted tribes of a Nation married by the Colonial Masters. This led to the Civil war that left millions dead – Chimamanda’s award-winning book, Half of The Yellow Sun is centered on this.
The Igbo’s have constantly sought a referendum and a chance to be heard. Constantly, the ruling government feels that deploying soldiers to the South-East to kill and maim civilians is the only way they can quell any agitations, meanwhile, the marauding Fulani/Boko Haram terrorists are left undefeated.
Yet again, last week, they killed unarmed Igbo men for demonstrating and singing for their freedom. Right now, it seems as if my country is on the brink of another Civil war.
An excerpt from BBC explaining The Biafra Civil War
Once I saw the prompt word ‘vol’ from Linda for today’s Stream of Consciousness, my mind got stuck on revolution.
Today’s guest post is brought to us by Joan and indeed she raises pertinent thoughts for those of us who are raising children outside our home countries.
How do we maintain our heritage while living in the diaspora? How do we pass on our culture to these younger generations even as they also embrace those of the places where they are being raised?
Please feel free to contribute to the discussion with your constructive feedback.
If you are interested in guest posting, you can check out this link.
For many parents, raising children in the Diaspora especially the US is such a daunting task. The reasons are many; however, cultural difference is a leading factor.
The African culture is far different from that in the Western world. This presents a serious dilemma for parents. Those that can afford or have got a proper structure back home usually send their children back home so that they learn the African values and mingle with the people. However, what can the rest do in order to keep their children more of Africans?
One thing to consider is that children learn by observing, so what are you showing them? What are you saying to them? That matters a lot from the word go. You can’t be perfect as the cultures around will obviously rub off on you in one way or another, but they will not completely change you.
As you raise your children, this is the best time to relish the African in you, hence pass it on to your babies. Besides that, children are resilient, they will know when a mistake is made, and that is if you care to acknowledge your mistakes before them.
They will also know when you are living a hypocritical life. That is when they will go out there to look for what is real. There is no harm in acknowledging your mistakes, for, through them, we learn. It also teaches them a lot such as the beauty of humility.
Another thing to note is that children are affected by nature (biologically and spiritually acquired traits) and nurture (traits acquired from surroundings).
Therefore, it would be great to surround your children with people that will positively impact their lives. In addition to that, take them to African churches, and then make it a point to make friends of families that cherish the same values as you do. That will in a long way help with raising a child that will give you joy.
While at church, encourage your children to join the various church groups, more so those that help them have a deeper understanding of their heritage. Besides that, when your little ones are deeply absorbed in Christianity from the get-go, their roots are more firmly established than when they start doing it at an earlier stage.
You could also enforce a policy where only the local language is spoken within the house. This is not as easy as it sounds more so when the children enrol into school.
However, even if they just have a basic comprehension, it is better than nothing at all. If it is possible, you could also try and live in communities that resonate with your specific African background.
You may not be able to send your children back home for extended stays for one reason or another. However, you could organise a trip for them back home once in their youth life. This will help them have a deeper understanding and appreciation of their culture, society and country on a whole. They will also get a chance to meet their extended family and better their local language prowess.
In as much as it is not easy to raise your child in the Diaspora, not all hope is lost.
Happy Parenting!
P.S. You can connect with Joan, the guest author on her blog Family, parenting and beyond where she shares her stories, aspirations, tips on parenting, family life and much more.
Below is my first just published Poetry Book “Out of the silent breath” which is available on Amazon and Smashwords.
When you buy my book, you support me in an invaluable manner.
I absolutely love this book of poems. My favorites are “Love Rations” (for those who love to give the silent treatment) and “Beggars Supper” (which definitely pulls at the heart strings). Two thumbs up!!
Haggling is an art! To live in an African society with it’s rowdy markets, you need to perfect the art of haggling over goods.
Recollections of days spent traipsing after mother or grandma at the market, trudging from pillar to post haggling over goods in order to get the best bargains makes me smile.
It was never a straight journey!
Purchases were made in-between hundreds of greeting exchanges.
These grown women would hug, chatter, ask about the entire family and their well-being, exclaim over the incessant climb in the price of goods, natter about the latest African prints fabric, discuss their next meetings and what have you, while you stood patiently with the basket waiting for that conversation to be over, only for another encounter of another auntie to occur down the line where yam tubers were sold.
The haggling dance between the seller and the buyer was one done in camaraderie.
A piece of yam tuber would be lifted, passed from the buyers one hand to the other to check how weighty, inspected to ensure that it was still fresh and when mother was satisfied with the selected yam piece, the pricing war begins with “how much?”
This could go on from one market stall to the other and the basket on your head got heavier with the items purchased.
On a good day, your assistance would be rewarded with some boiled groundnuts, fried puff-puffs or something little to nibble at.
Please do remember not to grumble when the haggling is going on otherwise, you might be rewarded with a proverb that says “a child carried on the back, does not realize that the journey is very far.”
For today’s quote, I shall leave you with these African proverbs:
“Life is like shopping in the market, when you finish your purchases, you go home.”
”One does not throw stones in the market square, because you don’t know whose head it might break.”
”Marriage is like eating groundnuts in pods! You have to crack it to see what is inside.”
I have totally enjoyed reminiscing over these proverbs for the past couple of days Oba all thanks to you.
I invite these awesome bloggers to feel free and share some quotes:
Blessed love.
© Jacqueline Oby-Ikocha
Learning to cook started at a young age for me; not that I remember being asked 😉 it was just the way things were.
From assisting mother in the kitchen in preparation of all sorts, to going over during the holidays to help grandma prepare her classic agidi jollof/wrapped corn meal and oil bean flakes which we would also help her sell at the local market; commercial trading was also learnt in the bargain.
Naturally, as a young child and a bookworm, often, I would get distracted or sneak into the restroom to read a quick page of my fave of the moment and the quick page turned into several; meanwhile my absorbed mind has forgotten that I was meant to be watching the pot of beans and ensure that it didn’t burn.
Needless to say, it was usually the aroma of burnt offering that alerted my nostrils to the disaster on fire and mothers voice raised to power two exclaiming away “Hia! this child will not kill me!”
The burnt level of the beans knew many degrees and the instruction to wash that burnt pot until it was gleaming enough to show the reflection of your teeth was never a small task. It kept you on the straight and narrow corner of the kitchen for some good days 🙂
Yet mothers patience never gave up on us. She continued teaching and we continued attempting to kill her, but thankfully never succeeded and turned out to be responsible adults today.
Let me leave you with this African proverb:
“When you overlook the small clay pot, it will boil over and put off the firewood.”
This can be translated in so many ways, but a quick example is: when you overlook a small bad habit, it becomes a character trait.
Once again Oba thank you for extending this invite. I am enjoying it.
To participate in the 3 quote challenge, I would like to invite:
Good day and blessings.
© Jacqueline Oby-Ikocha