a cooking pot and twisted tales
Thoughts and Tales…A Lifestyle Blog with a Zing.
A mother is a super-sonic person on twenty-four-hour duty. She has countless job descriptions all done for free đ
Though there’s no perfect way to being a mother, or a parent as a matter of fact, there are millions of  ways to being a good one by doing your best.
Jacqueline.
We all came from a parent and some people have foster, adoptive, and step -parents.
All the interactions that I have had with other parents lay emphasis on the fact that parenting is not a game or sport that comes with a one-size fit all manual.
Before I became a parent, I had absolutely no concrete idea what it would involve. Beyond imagining my cute babies in diapers, with ribbons in her hair or boys in baby blues, reading lots of motherhood literature, it’s been a case of trying, to the best of my ability and not losing my marbles while at it đ
As a matter of fact, it’s the hardest responsibility with far-reaching results that I have ever had to take on and you very well can’t resign from it. You are on duty 24/7 for the rest of your life even when they are old and have flown the coop and now it makes me appreciate my parents so much more.
I remember almost driving myself bonkers reading all  The Dr. James Dobson Parenting Collection
A parents duty as a custodian of these young ones involves imparting the right values, a sense of well-being a wholesome identity, attitude and an endless list of scenarios to work with.
Leaving a legacy for generations after is no piece of cake. The wrong path can cause a whole lot of damage to a child and alienate them. We learn to balance love and discipline, to apply authority and gain their confidence without being oppressive.
In my opinion, the act of procreation is not sufficient to make one a parent. As a matter of fact, in some instances, procreation simply makes the person a biological vessel that brought the child to being because I’ve seen instances where I question how some humans treat the child/children who have been bestowed on to them.
My greatest fear as a mother is failing in my duty to raise upstanding, responsible children who will be a positive testimony to their generation.
Apparently, without over-stressing it, raising children requires lots of grace and wise counsel from above.
© Jacqueline Oby-Ikocha
Apparently a parent, SoCS
Below is my first Poetry Book âOut of the silent breathâ which is available on Amazon and Smashwords.
When you buy my book, you support me in an invaluable manner.
Dance to your heartâs delight my African child, until echoes of your stamping feet, beating heart; bright eyes, smiling lips; and waving hands, resonates over and over like thunder claps, reverberating throughout the Universe.
Just dance.
“Parents need to fill a child’s bucket of self-esteem so high that the rest of the world can’t poke enough holes to drain it dry.” Alvin Price
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He does look cutely ferocious đ I bet I will scare people to death if I tried this.
Below is my first Poetry Book âOut of the silent breathâ which is available on Amazon and Smashwords.
When you buy my book, you support me in an invaluable manner.
This is a post swap between Linda and I. Be sure to visit her end and read my own little naughty side đ
We get to share a short story of each others childhood escapades.
Now, this is called collaboration and we should do more of such things in this space.
Linda’s one of my favourite bloggers in this space and if you haven’t been to Nutsrok, then you, my friend are so seriously missing out on very good chuckles and charming company.
She always has me in stitches and appreciative of life. Her real-life recounts on her growing up years is worth a movie and I don’t exaggerate.
It was impossible to tell what would land me in trouble when I was a little kid. Mother was impossible to please.
We had a new kitten. I found a kitty surprise in the baby bed and knew for a fact Mother wouldnât be happy, so I went into the kitchen and got Motherâs salad tongs.
She didnât use them a lot. I picked up the kitty surprise with the tongs and flushed it down the toilet.
The cat poop had been nice and dry and didnât leave a mark on the clean sheet. Pleased with myself for being helpful, I tossed the salad tongs in the sink and went on my self-satisfied way, without even bragging on myself.
In a few minutes, Mother called me. I found her examining the tongs, critically, looking and sniffing. âDid you use these tongs?â
Proudly, I answered, âYes, Maâam. The cat gee-geed in the baby bed and I cleaned it up for you!â I waited humbly for her praise.
Youâd have thought I broke a what-not like I had a few times!
âYou cleaned up a cat mess with my kitchen tongs and put them back in the sink. Look at the mess left on here! Do you want that on your food? Thatâs filthy. Iâm going to wear you out!â
She got the fly swat and flapped my bottom three times. I hardly felt it, but I was deeply offended at her ingratitude.
She never caught me cleaning up cat gee-gee again with kitchen tongs or anything else.
‘A father’s loving and guiding hands will remain on the daughters shoulders forever, even when he is long gone.’ Jacqueline Oby-Ikocha
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âI want to stay curled and cosied and chocolated….forever in my motherâs arms.â Sanober Khan
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#Hugs are free, but they are one of the best and simple things life offers from our loved ones.
© Jacqueline Oby-Ikocha
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I know it’s not weekend yet, but I am thankful that we are halfway there, or as in my case, almost a day to weekend and the school Spring breaks commences on Friday. YAYYYYY!!!
Our weekend’s over here in the Middle East starts on Thursday evenings and sometimes, it makes my mind go wonky, when the work week starts on Sunday’s and other parts of the World are still on a weekend.
It’s been one of those weeks that’s just bleh; waking up at past 4 am and making the children’s breakfast and food for school with one eye open.
I know that being a mother, weekend does not necessarily spell idling, but some things are taken out of the hectic equation.
My mouth will probably get twisted seven ways from talking, settling squabbles and I will probably pull my hair out now and again, for these days that squad will be fully at home, adrenaline filled and looking up to Mama the squad entertainer extraordinaire to keep them focused and entertained.
I shall however, thoroughly enjoy not having the infernal red alarm clock go off, just when I am getting into the zen part of the sleep; at least for the next two weeks. It even rings in my head when I am awake 
On the other hand, I am equally thankful for a lovely blogger’s bash held in this space. The supportive turn out was just awesome đ
I am equally excited that the cover of my collected poetry will soon be ready. There’ll definitely be a sneak peek.
What are the itty-bitty things that your heart knows thanks for?
Do share if you will. Thank you.
You can join Collineâs or Maria Jansson gratitude challenge platforms.
© Jacqueline Oby-Ikocha
As a matter of urgency,
It’s up to us to teach our progeny
The value of empathy.
It’s up to us to leave a legacy
That will help mold their destiny
To create good sense of well-being and identity
In an environment filled with harmony
We teach our children fair sense of equity
For them to stand as upright entities
Living in Truth, Love, Honour, Faith, Hope and Integrity.
© Jacqueline Oby-Ikocha
The Daily Post prompt legacy.
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Look me in the eyes
So that I may see into your heart
Whisper to me the loves songs
That radiates in your pupils
So that their echoes may make my blood thrum
When two hearts are in love
We have no need for so much words
For your eyes speak volumes
That your mouth cannot put into shape
Yet it makes my body sing.
Back in the days, my mother did a lot of speaking to us with her eyes. For instance, when we go out and someone offers us a cookie, you have to look at dear mother’s face, before daring to accept that cookie and the gleam in her eyes or the nod of her head will tell you what to do.
No words said! Sometimes, you might make a mistake in translating the meaning of that look and wolf down the biscuit.
You will surely have some explaining to do. One scrumptious cookie might not be worth all the drilling questions that you will have to answer to.
So if you are not too sure, you simply say, ‘No thank you Ma’ to the biscuit tender even if drool is pooling in your mouth.
Naturally, I love being around people and would talk to total strangers. In a safe environment of course because there are so many crazies in this time and age.
Sometimes, I go people watching, where I will see a large crowd of human beings going about their lives.
I may say nothing, but just let the cacophony of their words wash over me.
A snippet overheard here and there could trigger a memory, an inspiration, a story or more.
Sometimes, I wish I could do a documentary of some of the fascinating humans that I have come across.
It’s been a while that I had a girls night out with friends, where we would dance, laugh and shout on top of our voices.
No one hears what they other is saying, but we leave for our homes and husbands, happy as larks.
When it comes to serious talk, I like a one-on-one, where I can listen quietly, read your nuances and get a clear meaning of what you are trying to transmit.
The ideal conversation depends on the occasion, what is being discussed and also the people involved.
I also happen to love being left alone by myself. I am never bored being all alone because I have perfect conversations with myself and the many voices in my head.
No! I am not crazy like that. I don’t know if I am normal, but that’s fine. I don’t care if the ship with the normal people left without me a long time ago.
© Jacqueline Oby-Ikocha
The Daily Post prompt Counting Voices.
A lively group discussion, an intimate tĂȘte-Ă -tĂȘte, an inner monologue — in your view, when it comes to a good conversation, what’s the ideal number of people?
‘Icho ime ife, ime e ya ofuma.’
These wise words echoes in my ears as I write this post and it translates to mean ‘ anything worth doing, is what doing well.’
I remember growing up and having to go to our farm with my parents to till the ground for planting maize, cassava, potatoes, pumpkin and any other crop that was due to be planted. Back then we grew most of our food.
With my hoe, I would make what I considered a nice mound of red earth and when my dad comes round for inspection, he would call me by his pet name for me and in his gentle way, he would say: ‘you’ve done well, but it would be better if the mound was just a little higher’ and would complete his correction with that sentence up above.
This was repeatedly applied in so many ordinary things that we did, from our house chores of sweeping with the broom, washing plates, clothes, weeding the compound to our studies.
Thus it became embedded in my mind, that if you choose to do something, give it your best shot.
If you choose to love someone, love them without placing the conditions that they must fulfill to become worthy of your love.
If you are working for someone, do it wholeheartedly because some day, someone will probably turn around to work for you. As my people would say ‘when you respect the King, Kingship will also come to you.’
In everything that one does, they should do it to the best of their ability. Not for the sake of eye service, but for the sake of self-service.
Sow and Water and leave the bountiful harvest to providence. It always pays in heaps and spades.
Let me leave these three extra farming proverbs for you to mull over with your cup of coffee:
‘Good gardens are not made by sitting in the shade.’
‘As the farm grows, so does the farmer.’
‘If you tickle your earth hard enough, she will laugh for you with bountiful harvest.’
I would like to thank Maria Jansson for her generous invitation to participate in the quotes challenge and would like to extend the invitation to these lovely bloggers.
P.S. No hard rules to participate.
© Jacqueline Oby-Ikocha
a cooking pot and twisted tales 