Tag Archive | Control

The Power Lies with You – My Thinking Corner

Thoughts become things and it’s our inaction or reaction that gives negative thoughts its sustenance. Jacqueline

Thinking, Power over thoughts

Negative thoughts drain our energy and prevent us from enjoying our present moments. The more we dwell on them, the bigger they become till they take a life of their own and become difficult to uproot.

For example, it’s so easy for a word wrongly said by one partner to the other to spiral from that single word to each party visualizing a negative future that would most likely not occur.

When these negative thoughts start brewing, it’s hard to stop them. Shifting ones’ focus to positive thoughts may not be easy to do but with practice it ‘s effective.

Shifting thought patterns is the only way, especially if you want to avoid going down a path that is painful and unnecessary.

Try these simple tips to help shift your thought pattern.

  • Read positive quotes
  • Switch the tone of your thoughts from  negative to positive even if at first it seems difficult.
  • Listen to meditative music or play music that makes you happy.
  • Always remember that there’s always a way out. You are not stuck.
  • Get out of your own head and take the focus away from you to someone or something else. Help someone else and shift your balance.
  • Sing, dance, and smile 🙂
  • Mentally make a list of things that you are grateful for and remember that no one is perfect.

Carol’s words on preparing for setback is just the right pep-talk one needs on rough days.

 

Psalms 94:19 – In the multitude of my thoughts within me thy comforts delight my soul.

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Midnight Motivation and Musings 105

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Worry and fear are intermarried and no one likes how both make you feel, yet it’s often difficult to stop and they tend to grow in enormity until they become huge factors that occupy they mind of the troubled person.

Worrying can be helpful if it spurs you to take the necessary actions to solve a problem.

However, if you’re preoccupied with all the what if’s and the worst-case scenarios, it turns into fear and becomes a problem.

Persistent doubts and fears can be paralyzing because they will sap your emotional energy, raise your anxiety levels even induce possible panic attacks and affect your daily life as well as how you view things.

Persistent worrying is a mental habit that you can break, but it will require training your mind and body to stay calm while maintaining a more positive perspective towards life.

There’s a little trick that I’ve been implementing for years now and it’s helped me in enormous ways.

  • I created a worry period by choosing a specific time and mostly early in the morning when I wake up and about to do my meditative prayer. This way, I de-clutter my mind as much as possible and reduce all sources of anxiety before my day takes off. If possible choose a set time and place for worrying and during the worry period, let yourself dwell on the issues on your mind but for the rest of the day, maintain a worry-free zone.  The best way to get a handle on this is by writing down the things bothering you and go over them one by one, but only for the amount of time you’ve specified for it.

Having a period to worry over issues is effective because it helps you to break the habit of dwelling on them when you’ve got other things to do. You are neither suppressing these thoughts but simply apportioning time to them as you do your other daily activities and as you keep up with the practice you will find that you have the ability to postpone your anxious thoughts and to be in better control.

All the best.

Jacqueline

P.S: I hope to see you at our online party this weekend. It’s always a good time 🙂


Below is my first just published Poetry Book “Out of the silent breath” which is available on Amazon and Smashwords.

When you buy my book, you support me in an invaluable manner.

 

‘A Richly Layered and Passionate Read.’ Jan Cliff

Out of the silent breath

If you enjoy my works, you can fuel my creativity with a cup of coffee or a slice of cake😉

Me and my dirty thoughts…Streams of consciousness Saturday.

“Just put a brake on those thoughts my dear lady! Okay, simmer in them a little bit and get all dirty, then put a lid on the steam because you know how dirty it can get when you go down low.”

That phrase above was my sensible mind lecturing the roaming sad part of my mind that woke up this morning looking for all the sad things and dirty thoughts to latch onto so that she can get thoroughly miserable.

A lot of times, the state of mind that we go to bed with determines our waking thoughts and I’ve been teaching myself how to train my mind into serenity before retiring to sleep.

Sometimes, I fail to control the brakes of certain wheels of thoughts that start out innocently by wandering a dark path and before you know it, it snowballs into one ugly, berating predator.

It’s definitely good to think things through but in a sensible manner of mind over matter and not letting my emotional intelligence fall to pieces by allowing my renegade thoughts that can run at break-neck speed lead me into the temptation.

It’s a natural tendency for us to seek out ways of comfort when we are feeling some discomfort, physically or otherwise and my current feelings of discomfort were emanating from deep recesses.

The next pit-stop if I willingly followed that piper’s flute is to either look for food to eat to comfort myself, or get into a tiff with dear Himself – who did nothing to earn my quarrel, or growl at the children and leave them perplexed or watch a sappy chick flick so that I can have some reason to cry over what I don’t even fully understand.

Okay. Enough said. I’m glad I put a brake on the thoughts for now and haven’t done something silly so far. I’m just going to toddle off and give my mind a break. I’m going to do what I call my methodical solution thinking and get to the nitty-gritty of my rotten feeling.

That’s after some good breakfast at least 🙂

Now, I feel kind of better and more proactive. Thank you, Linda, for today’s breaking prompt.

Jacqueline


Below is my first just published Poetry Book “Out of the silent breath” which is available on Amazon and Smashwords.

When you buy my book, you support me in an invaluable manner.

Out of the silent breath

Expose my heart

that I may understand your words

through every conscious,

awakened pore of each moment.

**

*an excerpt from my poem*

Midnight Motivations and Musings 67

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Naturally as humans, when we are witnesses to the success of others, there’s a deep inclination inside us that experiences a tinge of envy and want.

This is what gives birth to rivalry and competitiveness.

However, there are ways of harnessing our human need to excel and thrive without letting jealous notions be the main driver or our desire.

One, it’s not sustainable to operate that way because your function will be based on clouded emotions that will get the better of you.

Two, it’s never been a successful line to tow and a jealous master is a dangerous one.

Asides from the scriptural angle of things, it’s simply a terrible way for one to spend their lives comparing themselves to others.

It’s a far better approach seeking your own route. If you per chance admire the work of someone else and wish to do the same, be pragmatic about it. Learn

© Jacqueline Oby-Ikocha

Midnight Motivations and Musings # 46

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Ever since I made up my mind to let go of dwelling on non-essentials that didn’t further my existence and probably only contributed to making a miserable day, I found more peace.

Ever since I chose to make conscious, deliberate efforts to apply positive affirmations and frame of mind to my days, it only got better.

Yes, it is possible to live a purpose-driven life.

Yes, happiness is a deliberate choice.

Yes, each day can be as best as we can make it all things being equal.

Of course there are things that are out of our control, like nature and other people’s actions, but we run our own workshop of our minds and home.

Indeed, there are days that are a bit off, but, I’ve observed that once you get into the habit of positive thoughts and living, such moods and days barely last because your mind fights to switch to the frame that works best for it.

Your days are as good as you make them. Be happy not by trying to convince others, but by being yourself and the best that you can be.

© Jacqueline Oby-Ikocha