Tag Archive | Faith in God

Trusting You…An Open Prayer

Dear God,

Thank you for everything. It’s me. Standing here in need to be heard. I try to keep a positive and upbeat attitude, but many times doubt creeps in through the cracks. I will not live in the debilitating fear of uncertainty. I will try not to worry ‘cos worry simply amplifies a problem. I will keep my faith and not fear about being unable to provide or to succeed. I believe that you’ll provide for us as you have always done and that success is my just reward.

Dear Lord, however, I can’t lie and I must confess to you that there are days that I fret so much about our finances and future. There are days that holding on seems such a struggle. Days that I fervently pray for calmness in the periods of storm and that your grace is sufficient unto that day.

Dear Lord, I try to pragmatically do just do what needs to be done, though most times I am not even sure anymore.

All I know is today. I am trusting you for today.

Amen

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At a point it was sinking sand…

mountain tops

In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “Mountaintops and Valleys.”

Describe a time when you quickly switched from feeling at the top of the world to sinking all the way down (or vice versa). Did you learn anything about yourself in the process?

Despite conscious efforts not to be a depressing wet blanket, to maintain a sunny and optimistic outlook in life, there are times when life throws you sucker punches that leaves you gasping for breath and almost asphyxiated.  You are left grappling at anything that will keep you from sinking down the bog that is eager and willing to swallow you whole greedily.

I can think of personal events that hit me in the solar plexus and dragged me from high to rock bottom.

I hate to pull out the tissue box, but I have also learnt that talking about these things, helps to heal gaping wounds.

  • The loss of my preemie baby.
  • 2 consecutive miscarriages.
  • The loss of my dad.
  • A car accident that took the life of a young man. I was the driver!

Without expending a lot of adjectives and flowery prose, losing a baby or even a pregnancy plunges one from the delight of expectancy to nothing… to the pits of despair, hopelessness, anger, sadness, and a multitude of emotions that I can barely define. I leave the rest for you to imagine.

Hearing placating words during such occurrence was barely sufficient if not upsetting. I remember when I suddenly lost my 28 week old baby, and a friend said to me “don’t worry, another baby will come” all I asked was whether a child is a replaceable item like furniture?

My dad’s passing was not a sudden event. It was a painful, grueling battle with cancer and it was not the best of times. Watching the strong man whom I loved so much bowed down by a vicious ailment which left him the ‘sufferer’ and those around him stricken beyond words is not something that I would wish anyone.

We fought like Tigers, but we were left beaten, bruised, bloodied and we lost. Knowing that he was ill did not make the pain any less. My sole joy is that I can honestly testify that my late dad was a good, gentle and upright soul. I will always miss him.

Another event that struck like a bolt of lightning out of the blues was a car accident that I was involved in. You might want to read this A letter to the young man that died. That saying, that a split second can change everything about someone’s life remains true.

I did not come away from these experiences empty handed. I have learnt and still learning to live in the moment and appreciate it. That I can be strong when there is no other choice and not to take anyone or anything for granted.

My biggest lesson so far has been a spiritual journey in Trusting, Believing, and having Faith in God. He has been my source of strength, sanity and boundless peace during these stormy times.

If per chance sharing my experience (that it is possible for someone to rise from the shadowy doldrums to face the light) serves as a source of inspiration and hope for anyone, then something positive would have been achieved.

Jacqueline Oby-Ikocha

P.S. No more soppy prompts please. I am out of tissue box. Thank you 😉

Image credit: Sayquotable.com