Purpose Driven Project – Stream of Consciousness Saturday

March 4, 2017 jacquelineobyikocha6 Comments

Project dreams of your life as vividly as you can into your mind like a 9D cinema that they are imprinted into every fiber of your being. Let every waking moment find you rising up with a purpose that even the failures in your path serve as projectiles that fuels and fires you up to keep going after your dreams.

Experience keeps teaching me that our lives are not projects full of checklists but an experience with lots of vicissitudes yet when we come to this humble understanding that how our life pretty much turns out is dependent on how we transform these sometimes daunting circumstances that life tosses our way and indeed that sometimes we have to aim at living a Purpose Driven Life by applying rules of project management to achieve the success we seek for.

Our approach also involves a clear avoidance of projecting our failures on someone else and using them as a lame excuse to justify our shortcomings. Doing so is simply giving up ownership and responsibility of our lives to someone else.

Would you feel safe transferring a sensitive project that its result determines and defines your success into the hands of someone else?

Your life is your project so, what’s your answer?

You are invited to our monthly blog party taking place right now. Just follow this link and meet others.

Jacqueline

Project – SoCS

P.S. My consciousness has been constantly focused on following my dreams maybe because I keep reminding myself that time is too short to waste it and interestingly one good thing that I find about SoCS is that the prompt we receive each weekend from Linda has a way of tuning into my present thoughts. You are invited to join the fun.

Stream of Consciousness Saturday.

How Do We Explain This?

February 26, 2017 jacquelineobyikocha10 Comments

How on earth do humans forget so quickly that xenophobic history continually repeats itself? I thought that like is commonly said that experience is the best teacher should have taught us hard earned lessons by now that hate is such a destructive fuel that divides and dehumanizes?

How can we explain recent wicked acts that are perpetrated in civil society? How can we condone these things as though they are normal?

Watching recent vile, vivid videos about Xenophobic attacks in South Africa – acts of hatred perpetrated by black South Africans on other African natives residing over there, people from Nations who stood by South Africans through Apartheid – where the perpetrators cite the lack of jobs in their community as the fault of non-indigenes who have taken all their jobs. A particular video making the rounds issues a serious warning of more attacks if the non-SA residents don’t leave in the next 14 days.

I wish that my brain could unwatch these despicable acts of horror. How exactly do these specimens of homo sapiens live with themselves after their deplorable acts?

My mind hovers on the current situation in the States and I fear for the degeneration of situations. Some may have not seen the documentary, but an underground network of sanctuaries is sprouting up anonymously in the US by concerned citizens who want to help victims caught up in the ICE windstorm.

Does this not bring the underground railroad set up for slaves to mind? Are we retrogressing or what?

How have we forgotten the horrors of the holocaust, the annihilation of the Native Americans, the bitter fruits of slavery still being harvested till today? How do humans make such poor students and such horrible mistakes?

I am still struggling to understand how hate can consume the mind so much that all reasoning fails. Sometimes, I wonder if people fail to realize that none of us will get out of here alive. That the piece of red earth we fight tooth and nail, kill and maim others for will still fall to the termites?

How far are we willing to degenerate before we can rise up and say enough?

We are better than this. We are one human race and I hope someday that we’ll realize this somehow.

Jacqueline

SoCS – How

Stream of Consciousness Saturday.

Hair You Go – Stream of Consciousness Saturday

February 4, 2017 jacquelineobyikocha5 Comments

Splitting hairs is simply not my thing. It’s a time-wasting effort to quibble over petty stuff that adds no real value to my life. Moreso, now that I realize the value of my time, I have no time to be an armchair critic or to sit in a highchair and pontificate over other people’s lives, when I can get up and go do things that are more elevating as long as they are not so hair-raising enough to curdle my blood in fear, which brings me to my hairstyles and me.

Over decades my hair has evolved from one hairdo to the other, that I doubt if I can even count the number of times it I’ve worn it in a different way. I’ve had a crew cut, low cut, Shalamar cut, bobbed it, Jheri-curled it, grown it out, permed it, wore afros, braids, weaves, tinted, coloured, bleached, the list is endless.

Each point in time, I enjoy the God-given adornment on my head and the alternating hair this and that. Afro hair is not as easy to manage, as the Caucasian hair thus you find Black women don’t joke with their hair in the least. They spend tons of money on hairdos and half of their lives in hair salons.

We also have lots of bad hair days when you wake up cross-eyed and have to spend sufficient time before the mirror trying to get the hair to behave itself. I got tired of all the hair works and indulged in a major hair cut sometime last year taking off the perm and growing a natural afro. Now, I have my hair in

Now, I have my hair in fabu-locks and they are going to stay this way for some time to come. I am totally enjoying the freedom the new hairdo allows me. Now I spend far less time spent in any hair salon and have no need to worry about bad hair days.

Well, enough hairy ramble, I got to run along. I promised to take my children somewhere today and they are literally in my hair bugging me to get going. Enjoy your weekend.

Jacqueline

SoCS – Hair

Stream of Consciousness Saturday.

Let’s Not Throw Stones – Stream of Consciousness Saturday

January 21, 2017 jacquelineobyikocha30 Comments

Glass houses shatter and everyone inside gets cut with the jagged shards.

Today’s prompt ‘glass,’ for SoCS made me think of the saying about people who live in glass houses, yet they are busy casting aspersions and throwing stones at those who live in brick houses or even no houses at all.

It made me think of my so-called classy, fine folks. Evangelicals who look into their looking glasses like the wicked stepmother and adjudge themselves as the very best of humankind, meanwhile the milk of compassion and empathy runs dry in their veins.

They hide their hypocrisy, prejudice and multitude of sins under falsehood, spouting off biblical quotes twisted to suit their purpose and case in time.

They spend valuable time picking specks from their neighbours’ eye’s yet huge logs of sin occupies their souls and front yard.

These modern days Evangelicals remind me of the Pharisees – the ruling class – who crucified Jesus. They hated Jesus not because He called them names, or called out their hypocrisy, but because He threatened their security, their prestige and their income. He was going to ruin everything they had worked so hard for and would get everybody killed.

Doesn’t it sound a bit familiar? Today, we have brokered uneven peace around the World. I wonder how long our glass houses can hold up?

I am a Christain and my believe is that the practice of my faith is not a Religion. It’s in the way that I would treat my fellow man.

I want to be able to look into my looking glass and see beyond the mirrored image before my eyes’. I want to see a clear image of who I am, when no one is watching, inside my closet.

The true reflection of a man is not that image that’s mirrored before his own eye’s, but the reflection of his soul. This is the reflection that I want to see through the glass.

SoCS – Glass

Stream of Consciousness Saturday.

The Sharp Drama’s of My Life – Streams of Consciousness Saturday

December 3, 2016December 3, 2016 jacquelineobyikocha64 Comments

Sharp contrasting thoughts muddle my mind with sheer self-castigation as I look at the year dwindling to an end and find myself counting the things that I had mentally set out to achieve for myself but find that I fall far short of my own expectations. I started out the year on such a highly motivated note but I guess that I am suffering from battered emotions syndrome. Some are self-induced, while life brought it’s own baggage along. I am seized with the desire to do absolutely nothing almost to the point of it getting scary.

Sharing my thoughts might help to crank up my gears and pull me out of wallowing in shallow thoughts and sheer laziness. I have an attitude that believes in pulling myself out of depressive moods, but for reasons that I can’t put my fingers on, I simply wish to burrow down, dig the hole deeper and just roll in the muddy waters of woe-is-me.

Self-pity has never been my thing otherwise, I would never have survived some of the hard balls life had tossed my way. I find that despair and depression are twins and that most times it’s far easier to give in to the whiny pair than to get up and fight. I find that as a highly motivated, driven person that the bar I set for myself is usually high and that whenever I fall short of these expectations, I feel the burn.

I’m trying to step back and take all the necessary thoughts into account without clouding my mind with any unnecessary feel good feelings or numbing myself with so much work that I’m too tired to think. That is why I deliberately chose not to blog for some days.

Sometimes we have to go through the motions and not bury our emotions otherwise, they will simply fester and actually grow bigger. I’m not making excuses for falling off the wagon and failing to achieve the short goals that I set for myself, I am not making excuses for depression that hits me at times with visceral pain and trying to wave it away with a wand.

I will not try to shake off these Debbie Downer feelings and cut short my low moments because they will simply hibernate and possibly drag their sorry ass selves into my next year. No! I can’t have that.

I am sitting here in my raggedy PJ’s and floppy rabbit slippers, with a carving knife in the shape of a pen. I’m going to cut myself to pieces, bleed, cry into a box of tissues, eat chocolate, drink stale wine, eat chocolates again, watch a soppy MGM movie, cry some more again, cut myself some more until my nose gets bulbous and my eyes are swollen shut from crying tears that cause my shoulders to shake.

I’m not going to look pretty, but I can bet your bottom dollar that I am going to feel marvellous after all the shakeup. Then I’ll patch up the pieces that I shredded.

P.S. Please excuse me for not visiting for a while. My door is shut while I’m going through some drama. I’ll be back shortly.

Yours,

Jacqueline

SoCS – ‘sh’

Stream of Consciousness Saturday.

Few of my favourite things – Streams of Consciousness Saturday

November 26, 2016November 26, 2016 jacquelineobyikocha18 Comments

I love pretty things. They are delightful to look at. I’ve always loved colour splashes and if truth be told, I have no favourite colour ‘cos I love them all.

There’s something pretty about each hue and my eclectic self can never seem to decide on a colour that’s the best colour.

I’m a sound of music kinda girl and at the same time a spirited ruff and tumble kind of person.

I no longer try to define myself because no definition does a pretty good job of summing me up. I confuse the heck out of my dear Himself at times 🙂

Pretty ribbons and sashes, pretty flowers, a pretty, frilly, girly frock are a few of my favourite things.

A pretty frock on a little girl or indeed a lady transforms her. I do own several pretty dresses though my jeans are my quick get-ups to wear when in a dash.

On Sundays, I enjoy dressing up for Church, in a pretty dress, my heels and sometimes a hat or scarf depending on my mood.

My walk simply changes and the swing in my hips decidedly pronounced, I guess it’s the combination of the heels and dress and my dear husband loves it too 😉

These days, I take my time to shop – except for groceries that are essential to survival. I choose carefully what I want to buy either for my home or to wear. It has to be pretty, aesthetically pleasing. Something that would make my heart smile.

There’s no point acquiring things just sporadically and for the fun of it. I try to surround myself with those pretty things that warm me up and enhance my sense of pleasure.

Life is pretty fast these days and the days are too short to waste on ugliness.

Jacqueline Oby-Ikocha

20160320_134719

SoCS prompt – Pretty

Stream of Consciousness Saturday.

Yesterday’s Dreams – Stream of Consciousness Saturday

November 19, 2016 jacquelineobyikocha11 Comments

Ghosts of
yesterday’s dreams
lie beaten
in the abyss
of unrequited desires
crushed and dejected
stretching bony limbs
that wraps
skeletal fingers around legs
dragging its’ bony frame along
and
slowing down
today’s dreams

Let us
bury yesterday
say our goodbye’s
with tears in our eyes
to dreams aborted
like unwanted fruits
embrace with a purpose
golden opportunities
of today dreams
that we may profit
from its’ fruits
lest they fall
like yesterday.

Jacqueline Oby-Ikocha

Stream of Consciousness Saturday prompt – YES

Stream of Consciousness Saturday.

Personal Memories – Streams of Consciousness Saturday

November 12, 2016 jacquelineobyikocha27 Comments

Memories are powerful parts of who we are, where we are coming from and most times they inform how we venture further afield into life. Some memories fade with time, while some hold dark moments in our lives even when we try to suppress them.

Some memories burn vivid and bright in our minds and evoke a sublime state of happiness in our lives that we unwittingly wish to cling to such memories even when that time has long passed. These are the memories that I wish I could hold in the palm of my hands, but I store them in a better place – my heart.

A lot of times, I remember moments in time of my childhood when all I knew was the cocooning love of my parents and as an adult, I crawl back into my head into those moments that suffuse my entire being with softness and warmth.

Each day that passes by brings memories of my loved ones’ who have passed on to the other side to my mind. They are the one’s who shaped my life and molded my values as the human that I am today. My late dad and my beautiful, enigmatic grandmothers.

My dad is/was a man amongst men. A gentleman to the letter. A firm, fair-minded and peaceful fellow. He loved music. He was creative and diligent. He loved people. He worked hard. He was a good man, good father, and provider. He loved me.

Sometimes, memories of him bring bittersweet tears to my eyes’ that even after 3 years of his passing, I get a lump in my throat whenever my thoughts dwell on him. He was my anchor.

Memories of my grandmothers’ are filled with softness, with laughter, with tales of folklore, proverbs and life lessons. With pampering with one hand and a hard smack on the butt for misbehaving, with eating freshly prepared meals made on firewood and earthenware pots. They are filled with remembrance of massaging aching muscles with locally prepared shea butter and the heartfelt thank you that my gran would say. As I write this I can hear the echo of her voice in my head as she says ‘Nnedim, Ezigbo nwa.’

Now I have the great urge to eat from an earthenware pot, to sit on a three-legged stool in the small kitchen back in my village and to watch the pregnant nanny goat as she chewed a portion of yam peels with certainty.

Linda, thank you for taking me down memory lane with today’s prompt. As we remember the heroes in our lives, the heroes past, it comes to my mind to point out that heroes are not only those who fought armed battles but all those who make sacrifices every day to ensure that our future is better. Go and be someone’s hero today.

Quick glossary:

Nnedim – In Igbo language means ‘my husbands’ mother.’ My gran believed in reincarnation and that I’m her mother-in-law who she spoke of with such fondness and love.

Ezigbo Nwa – means ‘good child.’

Stream of Consciousness Saturday.

Indulgence…Streams of Consciousness Saturday

November 6, 2016 jacquelineobyikocha24 Comments

My Stream of Consciousness Saturday comes out late because I had a brainwave yesterday and indulged in something that’s almost become a novelty for me.

I shut down my systems completely throughout yesterday, took a novel and my mat to the park with my children where I read, dozed off to sleep to the tweet of birds, the gentle breeze, the sound of children playing in the background, the tantalizing aroma of grilling sausages and sweet smell of cotton candy floating to my nostrils sporadically.

I woke up refreshed, thankful and relaxed and I said to myself ‘Jacqueline, you must indulge in this novelty often enough.’

I doubt if it will ever grow stale to just step back for a few hours and just be without the undue pressure that we put on ourselves trying to meet all manners of deadlines.

To more novelty and reading novels 🙂

Stream of Consciousness Saturday.

What stays in? Stream of Consciousness Saturday.

October 29, 2016 jacquelineobyikocha6 Comments

I am half-awake, floating in and out of sleepiness with random streams of thoughts parading in and out of my mind in a sporadic fashion. My mind is besieged by many things outlined on my to-do list and I make a mental note to look at each with more perceptive eyes.

What stays in and what gets weeded out or shoved to the bottom of the list?

Arrgh! I feel like opening up the lid of my thoughts to let out some steam and to let in some fresh relief. 24 hours seem not enough these days – once the Sun comes out, the day races past and before you can say Jumping Jimminikins – it’s night time.

I read somewhere that sometimes you should find a spare space where you can scream at nothing and no one, but just to let the pent up emotions out. I think that should be fun.

Now back to my rambling thoughts, work on fresh posts for my new site, write my SoCS, curate photos for the gallery that I’m setting up, cook some porridge beans, socialize a bit online, listen to the news with half an ear, fill out some affiliate forms online, go for grocery shopping, write a chapter in my book, ……endless blah, blah, blah

Nothing that I can chuck out for now, apparently everything stays in.

Oh well, let me go and say hello to my guests at my Blog-O-Ween party. Are you stepping into my party? Come and check it out 🙂

Linda gave us the prompt of in/out for today’s SoCS and all I could think of are the thoughts dancing in and out of my head. You could join SoCS.