I haven’t been posting as much for various reasons. I needed to take a mini pause. Sometimes, you pause in life to recount your plot and your steps. You pause to trace and ensure that you are still walking in alignment with your aspirations and goals. Sometimes, we stop running on auto and pause to take a deep breath, to review things with a clearer mind and regain or retain our vision.
The challenge with running on autopilot is that it begins to feel like someone else is driving, and not us. Our brains tend to develop an unconscious decision-making system so we can take care of routine tasks. It prevents us from overloading, yet at the same time it creates a monotony that can become predictably boring.
I realized that my days had quietly slid into autopilot, and I almost didn’t know how to backtrack and switch off. Here are some of the things I noticed about my autopilot mode:
My routine became highly predictable and filled with repetitive activities that were no longer so satisfying.
It seemed as if I was always on the go even when I wasn’t moving. I was not pausing long enough to reflect on how I was feeling or what I was doing. I was either busy, distracted, or both.
It felt as if I never had enough time to accomplish much and I was left feeling guilty, with the need to meet so many expectations.
A lingering sense of dissatisfaction and that need to meet up with unnamed expectations.
I have to keep consciously reminding myself that the autopilot mode of lifestyle is not the only form of living, but slow, intentional and conscious lifestyle helps me stay focused on my purpose and goals. Am I meeting them? Are they satisfying? If not, why not?
For me, a pause is more than slowing down. It means creating space to start paying attention, it means not letting my routine dictate my life and become like a noose. It means bringing more mindfulness to my daily life.
In no way am I an ‘Expert On Life Matters’ and I am doubtful if anyone with such a befitting title exists. We all have our life’s lessons that we’ve learnt on our paths, but the essence of interacting with each other as we go along, is to learn from our experiences.
Enlightenment comes from learning. Learning comes from communicating and communicating is the most essential back bone of all relationships.
Like I always believe, each person has something to bring to the table and in my place, we have a funny proverb that says that ‘when we gather together to piss in the same spot, it foams.’
There are a thousand and one things that I have personally learnt from others just by reading their thoughts and perspectives and each day, it simply gets better. There are lots of free resources and wise counsel that others have put together which you can avail yourself to, but also be willing to add something to the pissing pot.
Don’t just be a sponge that soaks in without adding value. Your value could be from sharing, encouraging remarks, appreciation etc. We all can do it together, because life is definitely not a journey that you can walk all by yourself. As my people will also say, if you want to go fast you go alone, but if you want to go far, you go with others.
Advise to self. If you don’t use it, you most certainly lose it. Writing is like your muscles, when left to idle, they become flabby, weak, tired… I sit in front of my laptop with the little imps on my left and right shoulder squabbling to gain my attention. Arrgh! Said the imp on the left, ‘You no longer have the words. You can’t seem to think of what to write. Why not wait till early tomorrow morning when you feel perkier and up to the task of tasking your brain? Sounded like a very good and friendly idea to me.
Wait a minute! Squeaked the imp on my right. This same dumb reasoning is what has kept you in this rut all these days. Many early morning plans set for tomorrow have come and gone and we have lost count of the tomorrows. I don’t truly care if you’ve got nothing to say now, but say something, anything. JUST SAY SOMETHING. Each day say something, ‘cos I am tired of how I am compelled to listen to those nagging, guilt-ridden inner voices of yours complaining and reminding you that you have simply sat of your wide butt and done nothing about the thoughts dancing in your head. I have heard their whispered threats and witnessed your sad countenance. I am fed up lady. Say something, he or is it she urged.
So, this is me saying something; a befuddled attempt to get back to my daily blogging. Hope you are doing well? Happy Easter to you and your family.
So WordPress sent me a congratulatory message for having spent 8 years in this space and I must say that the notification escaped me except that I just started going through the outstanding comments that I haven’t attended to in a while and found the gem tucked away in the thick pile of comments. How remiss of me!
I honestly can’t believe that 8 years have passed since I first made my post albeit in hesitation and yet, here we are – years down the line and the excitement for blogging hasn’t waned in the least. Although I did take a hiatus now and again to get myself together when life is a bit rough, my blog has never been far from my mind and has become that interwoven abstract tapestry of my life.
In this space I found a voice, I found a part of me that was missing, I found a community of likeminded souls, I found friends who though I have never meet them physically, I feel like I have known them for a good while. In this space I have found solace and encouragement, laughter and upliftment, inspiration and growth, camaraderie and so much.
Time does pass in a blink of an eye. I still vividly recall sitting on the high-stool of my kitchen’s island back in Houston, with the hot Summer sun peeping in through the blinds and tapping out my very first post not sure where I was heading…. and here we are… 8 years later. It has been a worthwhile experience and I have enjoyed it in entirety. To many more years of blogging, may this space continue to treat us well.
Life is an interwoven maze of our experiences. Days blur into each other creating our past, present, future and indeed, life is truly what we make of it.
The past is done and gone. A mere recollection that serves, hopefully, as a compass and guide in our present. A memory bank of moments lived which we sometimes relive in nostalgia or regret. The past we can never return to nor regain no matter how hard we try or how much we want it.
The present is what we live and inhabit and the culmination of our presents make our past, which is why our presence in our present deeply counts. This is where the key to our happiness lies. Staying fully present and living our best moments in the now – no matter how mundane our day may seem – so that when we look back on our recollections – which we tend to ruminate on – we will have fonder thoughts and reasons to smile and not sigh nor wince in regret.
The future is an illusion of time that we do not have. The future is infinite. We postpone everything to an imagined future when all we truly have is ‘NOW’ This is the bane of most of our lives: waiting, postponing, planning! When we truly get to understand that
Live all aspects of your present time as well as you can. Give everyday that you receive the best of you and life will reward you in the same coin.
I know that millions of us have faced this dilemma and sometimes, we are not sure which way to take out of the quandary. You are in a scenario where you are working just to make ends meet and find yourself stuck in a job rut for years on end. You are afraid to quit – because bills have to be paid, you don’t feel like searching for a new job – because you are comfortable in your stagnation and the uncertainty of starting anew occupies space in your mind, hence, it’s a case of the evil God known is better than a good God unknown. You are not particularly enthused with your colleagues maybe because of so many reasons better left unsaid. Simply put, the job has lost its allure.
There are ways to pick yourself up, to boost your mood and to get past the difficult period at work.
Take time away from your desk
Doing so does not equate scrolling the pages of social media, surfing the internet or idling by the water cooler when you should be creating a document or filing a report. Ensure that you take the necessary breaks owed to you and use them diligently. Try and fit in something that you truly you love during your lunch break whether it’s reading a book, going for a cup of coffee at the café in the neighbourhood, meeting up with a friend, heading to the gym, taking a walk, or a Zumba session, the time spent away from your desk will become something to look forward to and will boost your spirit.
Friends
In this aspect you can apply a two-pronged approach. Firstly, create time for your buddies no matter how tied up or how down you’re feeling. It is pretty easy to throw a pity party, retreat to the sofa and vegetate with a tub of ice-cream, pizza and what not, but at this point in time, what you truly need is to spend time with the people you love, people who love you and uplift you. Even a brief chat will remind you there’s more to your life than your present job. You can even pick up an activity, hobby or class to attend together and create more bonding time.
Additionally, make the necessary effort to build friendships with worthwhile colleagues. Though we are to remember to create the right boundaries in our workplace, It’s very rare that there won’t be even one person you get on with, and getting closer could make things more fun. Ask if your friend would like to go for lunch or borrow your book – anything to forge a bond.
Find laughter
Don’t be too glum faced and grimly serious about your job with your mouth turned down or in a straight line and a permanent frown on your face. Indeed, work has its serious aspect, but when you develop a playful aspect for yourself, you will be more lighthearted whilst accomplishing your set goals. As we laugh, we are better able to enjoy things. We release that sense of anxiety, frustration, pressure and undue stress.
Try harder
Truly, it’s a challenge not to develop an apathetic mindset when you’re interest in your job has waned, but don’t forget that at some point in time, you wanted this job. Putting in extra effort can be the difference in feeling bored at work and also makes time go quickly, besides, it gets you noticed. Portray yourself as someone who gets things done and others will be interested in offering you different projects etc. You really need to take things in hand and it might lead to a new, enjoyable and rewarding path.
Furthermore, you can think of better ways of improving your work processes and make suggestions to your boss or those who need to hear your thoughts. It will show that you are someone who thinks outside the box.
Personalitypep-up
Though the workplace is an arena where everyone has to temper themselves a bit, but it’s vital that you don’t go too far to dampen your lively or interesting character. If you someone who never has anything to contribute or interesting to say, as a matter of fact, people will be least interested in talking to you or being around you. Engage in work related social activities, share your thoughts of interesting outside the job related topics when discussions are being held. Don’t be afraid to speak up. Inasmuch as you are unique, also remember to be a part of the whole.
For those of us who enjoy putting our thoughts down in writing and etching our memories in journals and blog pages hopefully not to be forgotten, it is kind of disheartening to realize that there seems to be a natural decline in blog posts, bloggers and blogging. Correct me if I am wrong, but it does appear that the continuously evolving, newer and shinier ways of Social media interaction such as Tiktok and many others that I don’t know of keeps eroding into the audience that was initially dedicated to blogs.
Readers keep minimizing and engagement has dwindled down to the barest minimum. From my own perspective, I think this can be attributed to various reasons,
Personal blogging is quickly becoming a thing of the past, but as I mentioned above, there are multiple types of blogging.
The type of blogging that’s still alive is probably content marketing.
I think that the main shift here is that personal blogging is focused on the writer/blogger whilst blogging with the purpose of content marketing is focused on the reader.
The question online writers today are faced with when content writing is “how to their readers solve their problems?”
And from my observation is that the bloggers thriving nowadays are the ones who are:
creating problem-solving content
recommending products (either affiliate products or their own) that further solve their audience’s problems
I feel that in as much as content marketing has exploded in other areas of the internet, like YouTube, Instagram, podcasting etc. the written word still remains powerful.
Nowadays, for the most part, I don’t think people are logging onto their computers or phones excited to check up on their favorite blogger/writers like before. Maybe it’s me, but I would love to hear your thoughts about the blogging phenomenon.
There are those times when we think that things are not going the way that we hoped or planned. Our plan(s) seems to fall apart instead of coming together and as humans, sometimes, that sense of frustration sets in.
Countess times, our most important journeys becomes the ones that seem to lead us on a winding path that seems like the dead-end cul-de-sac, but to the glory of God there are no dead-ends. Adversity offers us opportunities to learn, to hope, to be patient, to trust, and to grow. Such seasons are inevitable in our lives and how we navigate them matters most.
When next you are experiencing life’s inevitable disappointments, don’t despair or panic. Never be reluctant to switch to plans, approach but don’t lose sight of the goal. Consider such setback as an opportunity to choose a different, more appropriate path.
Always have faith that God may actually be guiding you to an entirely different direction, a direction of His choosing and in line with His purpose for your life.
A dead-end to you may in actual fact be a highway set by God for you.
When the sun sets, it naturally reminds me not only of the end of a day, but the promise of a new dawn and I love them. Back in my home country Nigeria, we used to have very gorgeous sunsets especially where we lived, which was nice sleepy town located around the hills of Enugu.
However, living in these parts, it gets too hot in this horizon of the UAE that most times, I find myself running away from the sun instead of running towards the sunset.
Occasionally, I have stumbled across a lovely sunset here, unfortunately, I don’t think that I have ever managed to capture a great photograph of it.
The best that I have seen so far was around Jumeirah beach, close to the Burj Al Arab and it was truly beautiful.
Who knows, hopefully I’ll get to see another truly remarkable one before I venture away from these parts.
p.s. I finally concluded the bloganuary. So slowly but surely and I have enjoyed it immensely. I has helped me reignite the need to write/blog more frequently. Hope to see you around.
a cooking pot and twisted tales 