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Lifes Lessons… a personal story

jacquelineobyikocha

Parents and childrenEvery state of our being as a human is formed by lessons learnt.

The impact of life’s lessons taught a young mind especially through their parents and primary educators are very profound and these teachings can be compared to the art of weaving a basket, where, if the weaver does a careless job, everything unravels and must be started again.

However, if the weaver pays attention and does a careful job, their end product is a fine basket.

In the case of children, sometimes the shoddy, careless job of upbringing can leave negative indelible marks that takes ages to obliterate, if ever at all.

It is only now as a full grown mother of my own children, that I begin to understand and appreciate the numerous lessons that my parents painstakingly tried to drum home into me and I cannot thank them enough for caring about how I turned out as a human being.

Over the years and so many times in a day, an idiom or parable that my late dad said would simply repeat itself in my head.

Sometimes in such an eerie manner that I would feel as if he was right there with me.

To buttress a point he would say things like:

“When you know how to pound, you pound in the mortar, when you fail to learn how to pound, you end up pounding on the floor.”

“When a word is tossed at a sensible person, he takes it and pockets it for later use, but when a word is tossed at a profligate, he tosses it away and remains ever foolish.”

”You had better start looking for your black sheep before nighttime, otherwise, in the darkness of the night, you will not be able to recognize it.”

“A bad market day is recognized early in the morning.”

”You cannot carry a good head of palm fruit to pound in a leaking mortar.”

“You cannot plant corn and expect to harvest okra.”

On my mother’s part, she would elaborate her lessons with a dramatic flair sometimes:

“Whatsoever you do, to the least of my brothers, that you do unto me.” (in a sing-song voice).

”For a broom to sweep well, it must be bound with others. A lone broom stick cannot sweep a grain of sand.” (with a bound broom in her hand for demonstration).

“An okra plant can never grow taller than the planter. The planter can always bend it to harvest it’s fruits.” (the bending of a suitable item would be done with flourish).

Many lessons on contentment, generosity, integrity, hard work, love, kindness, belief, responsibility, admitting your mistakes, forgiveness, caring, humility, commitment, boldness, confidence, overcoming difficulties, living within your means, honesty, to seek God, values and so much more were taught. Now as I grow older, I understand it better.

As an adult, my surviving parent remains my best confidant and counselor. Her words parent quoteare gemstones.

Mum and dad were far from perfect but they tried their very best.

The lessons learnt paved way to who I am today and who I will become tomorrow.

© Jacqueline Oby-Ikocha

In response to NaBloPoMo prompt – Thursday, November 5

What is the most important lesson you learned as a child, and who taught it to you?

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Published by jacquelineobyikocha

A wordsmith with a vivid imagination, an eager mind and a burning desire to carve out tales. As I journey with my muse to that land of all possibilities and self discovery, I hope my personal evolution will serve as a beacon of inspiration for anyone who chooses to stop by.

34 thoughts on “Lifes Lessons… a personal story”

  1. Lovely. I lost my dad 15 years ago and mom just last year and though she and I had a somewhat contentious relationship (as she did with her whole family) I know both parents did their best to raise us all. And I learned many good lessons, including what I would choose to do differently in my life.

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  2. That is such a beautiful post! It sometimes scares me, the responsibility we have towards our children, and to some degree all the children we meet. It is also the challenge I enjoy the most. Thank you for a beautiful post. A good reminder to bring throughout my day. Thank you! Have a blessed day.
    /Maria

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    1. Thank you Maria. I think this is one of my greatest fear, the responsibility of raising upright children and also impacting positively on other around us. You make a beautiful mother and with grace you will excel. Kind regards.

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  4. Wonderful post. Yes I indeed parents mold us. .. I’m smiling now because I’m remember my dad and mom’s quotes. I know they’re smiling down at me. :0))

    Blessings,Emma

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  7. Oh this was just such a heartwarming post. I think one of the important insights we all hopefully grow up to realize is that our parents did the best they knew how.

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  10. This post made me smile, everyone’s parents are far from perfect but the ones that care do try their best and the children are the products of it. I loved, ” You cannot plant corn and expect to harvest okra”. It’s so true!

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  11. Your dad (as well as your mom) was full of wisdom. I love the quotes you posted, with my favorite one being ” A bad market day is recognized early in the morning!” They made me smile!

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  12. You are blessed to have grown in the hands of such wise and loving parents. You do them the honor they deserve. My love to your sweet mother. Your dad must be smiling in heaven each time he sees how much you appreciate what he taught you. To know that my children will appreciate what I teach them as you appreciate your dad can be a source of great joy for me. Thanks for sharing this Jacky; and let me congratulate you on making good use of the opportunity offered to you by your parents to grow into the successful woman that you are.

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    1. Sir Romanus, these are the richest words that I have heard in a long time. I truly and deeply appreciate them. I read your posts and they resonate very well with me and I know that you will pass on your wisdom to your children. My parents really did their best and I owe so much to them. I am really happy to have connected with you in this time. Thank you again for your beautiful words and God bless.

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      1. Wow, lovely Jacky! If nobody ever told you how sweet you are, let me say it loudly and clearly; but I know many have already told you that so I join my voice to theirs to say, “Sweet ‘girl'”. Why girl instead of woman? I have a stronger feeling of closeness using the word girl. It’s the same feeling of love I have for my daughters. Your brilliance comes through your posts unquestionably. My wish for you is that you continue to shine brighter everyday till you shine brightest some day.

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I love it when you decorate my heart with your words..