Creative Writing

The butcher…

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Caution: Not for the fainthearted.

His eyes and low slung purring Audi followed her. Trailing her loose-limbed steps from the bus stop, down to the dusky lit quiet street of the clandestine underground night club “The Cock and Bull”. It was a known for its open secrets of hosting nefarious activities, yet it drew the inquisitive and adventurous ones like bees to a honey dew pot. A place where no questions were asked and no answers received. A place to let your thoughts roam wild and possibly get lucky.

Watching the outline of her slight lissome built and her eclectic dressing in the dimmed haze of the night light, simply piqued his interest some more. Her profile showed attractive features (he liked them attractive) and he was on the prowl.

The past few weeks of keeping his nose clean and carrying on his normal life, had worn his patience thin and he needed the ensuing excitement that the night would offer.

Parking a block away, he quickly followed her retreating shadow into the rowdy club, and as usual no questions were asked, no answers offered.

The club which ran till the wee hours of the morning, was habitually smoke filled, darkly lit with only flashing colored light beams and very loud heavy metal music blaring from its powerful systems. Couples dotted the dance floor whilst some were ensconced in corners, getting to know each other.

“Hello beautiful”, he drawled in his smoky, melt my bones voice. He knew the effect that he had on women. They always took to him easily and he capitalized heavily on his charms. His height and well toned body never failed to draw their eyes. From his flinty grey eyes, clean shaven look that showed a well chiseled face and his short crew cut, it had all merged to radiate burnished good looks.

“Hello” she replied as she spun sideways on the high bar stool and gave him a quick once over. Her clingy short skirt had ridden up her thighs and her high boots which encased trim legs were crossed over each other.

He got an eyeful of slim and flawless thighs. As a matter of fact, she looked gorgeous from a closer view. She had a pixie face and smooth crop of shoulder length reddish blond hair, large outlined smokey eyes with thick long lashes and full bee-stung lips that shimmered from her lip gloss.

“Mind if I join you?” he asked.

“Suit yourself” she shrugged in response.

He quickly took the swivel stool beside her, perching sideways so that he can observe her some more, from a closer range.

“Can I buy you a drink?” he offered.

“If you please”, she responded.

Not too chatty, he silently observed. That suited him very well. He was not in the mood for a long chat either. He really had no desire for a “let’s get to know each other tonight kind of thing”.

His last encounter with the chatty Librarian who had practically talked his ears off before he silenced her, simply put him off talkative women.

He always homed in on the one’s that he perceived were lonely and needed someone to talk to. He was the epitome of an attentive gentleman, from the mousy teacher, to the sassy dancer, the divorced lonely curator, the stripper and so on. He had lost count of how many exactly, but between all the cities he had been in, he had left quite a good number of missing body trails.

Watching her delicate pale throat work as she downed a couple of shots of brandy, he was practically drooling and the sizzle of anticipated excitement caused his hairs to stand on ends.

He kept reaching into his denim pocket, to touch the sharp army knife ensconced in there from time to time. Each time he flexed his fingers around its smooth curved nut casing, he felt a jolt of confidence and adrenaline surge through his veins.

Her reasons for being at Cock & Bull were not divulged. She was acerbic in her responses, but for whatever reason, she obviously sought to drown her reasoning in an alcoholic binge and he obliged.

As she grew more relaxed and switched to Margarita’s, with each gulp of the pricey Margarita that raced down her throat, he grew bolder in his closeness until she was practically encased between his muscled thighs.

The drinks were done and the invitation back to his apartment was accepted. It was a quick silent drive in his plush, smoke and masculine scented ride. She sat in the warm, hugging confine of the leather car seat, and enjoyed the strumming beats of ”Eye of the Tiger”, whilst he kept running his fingers lightly over her exposed thigh.

They got back to his swanky apartment, and his whet appetite  couldn’t wait to get busy, but he did not want to rush through the process. He always savored the reeling in of his victim, watching her pupils dilate in fear, the scent of blood trickling down that vulnerable neck from the first cut, the feisty struggle and the inevitable end of necrophilia.

Sometimes, he was not sure which suited him better, to asphyxiate, or the clean slice of the throat. Nonetheless, he got immense satisfaction from the startled look of surprise each of them wore in death.

His sick mind had reached it’s height of excitement and he pounced on her like a caged Tiger, menacing and ready to desecrate her body.

Her mind kicked into action. Her legs lifted, jackknifing from the knee in a hitch kick. Her arms ranged out to the sides and contracted to cuddle her body. In a flash, she pulled out a knife that was tucked into her boots and thrust, with all her might, slicing from navel up. He was stupefied in shock. Her father had taught her well.

She had been born a circus gypsy, with a knife throwing father, and a mother that she hardly knew. From as little as six years, she had struggled on her own, moving from town to town on roadshows with her dad and the circus team that practically raised her and taught her all the tricks they knew. Her deceptive small stature always led some misguided men to underestimate her strength which had been built from years of balancing on wires and jumping hoops.

Unfortunately, years back, she had been too young, too naive, too trusting and too vulnerable to stop the abuse she had suffered in the hands of some slick buffoons who felt it was fun to ambush and have their way with a teenage ‘white trash’ as they had called her. But never again, she vowed, never again.

She stepped over his crumpled body as he lay gasping and clutching his spilled guts, and made off with his valuable belongings, fat wallet and purring Audi listening to the Eye of the Tiger.

© Jacqueline Oby-Ikocha

Who stalked who? You might care to ask.

 

 

 

 

Hope · Inspiration - Motivation

Passion in Hope…

all is not lost

A new day and renewed hope.

Hope, that little voice that says maybe,

Even when everything says maybe not.

Work with hopeful passion and you will gain momentum.

Work only for money, you gain tedium and you wear thin.

As you step into another new week,

Search out for the silver linings even in the dark clouds,

The hope that burgeons in your heart,

is your beacon that points you to your prosperity.

Remember that prosperity has a different meaning,

From one person to the other,

Prosperity is not only dependent on how much you made,

But equally measured by the satisfaction that you gained.

Be at peace.

© Jacqueline Oby-Ikocha

 

 

Hope · Inspiration - Motivation · Love · Tips for the day

Your home… a little tip for today.

20150707_130623Your real home lies within you.
Not the bricks and mortar house of glamor that you reside in.

All painted and glossy with every top of the range appliance that money can buy.

That my friend, is just your physical abode.

Your real home lies within you,

Yet the home within you is neglected, in shambles and in quandary,

That even a stray pet would not want to live in there,

Take care of the real home that lies within you;

Fill it with good things,

A large portion of love,

A fresh harvest of thanksgiving

A handful of forgiveness,

Some tablespoons of honesty,

A jug of faith,

A dash of loyalty,

An ounce of friendship,

Three tablespoons of tenderness,

A whole shake of patience,

One big barrel of laughter

And a large dose of prayer.

Blend it all together, and bake it in the oven of your heart with a pan of Hope until it is well done.

Serve your guests daily with generous portions,
And your real home will definitely gleam with splendor.

© Jacqueline Oby-Ikocha

Humor - Bellyful of laughter · Little rants · Social critic

Famished and angry…just a little rant

garfield

You put up a mouth-watering signage,

With delectable looking dishes on display,

Advertising the best Seafood,

In the entire seven continents,

You cared not to up another one,

To warn us about your sloppy service,

Or to inform us,

That we would have to sit for ages, 😦

Nibbling on our nails as appetizers,

Whilst waiting for your ever elusive menu,

And after waiting for ages,

A mere sliver of questionable sea fare,

Of dodgy this and that,

Barely sufficient,

And hardly palatable.

But haste you made,

No waste in collecting your wage.

Just so you know,

In the time I sat on your mat,

Like a fat cat,

I could have caught a Fat Trout,

At a cheaper route.

© Jacqueline Oby-Ikocha

Creative Writing · Uncategorized

A shout out to my neighbours. Day 3 – Blogging 101

20150709_012737My dear blogging neighbor,

To say that it is my pleasure to connect with a good number of you – the old hands and the newcomers might sound a bit blasé, but the truth still remains what it is; I am very pleased for having discovered such a well spring of dynamic and intriguing personalities in blogland.

Whilst foraging, I encountered a plethora of blogs: the extroverts, the introverts, the cheeky, the nerdy, the needy, the wise, the funny, the eye candies (food, fashion and photo blogs) the chatty story tellers (like myself), the inspirational ones, the humorous, the controversial, the motherly, the health, travel and everything else in between.

Some of you, I shamelessly courted their hands in friendship and they reciprocated, whilst some are still contemplating my offer 🙂

You all bring to the table, your experience, your exposure, irrespective of how small or large and your expertise especially amongst the old hands.

I graciously salute you all for your magnanimity in welcoming a newbie like me in the house and hope we can all find time to keep each other company in the blog-sphere at least.

Okay, now this is beginning to sound like a valedictory speech, so lets just jump on the wagon and enjoy the expedition and simply end the torture shall we?

Greetings and regards,

Jacqueline

Creative Writing · Humor - Bellyful of laughter

Flat butt or what?.. Silly thinking

Camera 360
Writer at Work

Do writers end up with a flat butt or what?

Sitting here at my desk, scribble, scribble, scribble,

type, type, type,

with a pillow under my gluteus maximus

cushioning the impact of wood on muscles

Yet I still feel the deflation of air from behind

Bringing such silly thought to my mind

What if? I question myself,

My aspirations, lead to deflation’s,

And I end up with a flat behind?

That would be a Rear End 🙂

© Jacqueline Oby-Ikocha

Creative Writing · Uncategorized

What inspired my Title and ever changing Tag line? Blogging 101

Here goes. For me, there is nothing like jumping in two feet into the moment than getting tardy and feeling like I have an albatross around my neck several days later. Therefore in answer to the question why I chose the title acookingpotandtwistedtales:

For a long while, I had been satisfied spinning my yard tales for my children and family alike (even my husband likes to listen in), as well as sharing them on Facebook with friends, but I never got round to blogging. I was far too busy with other things (I kept telling myself) and writing the stories in my journal,  waiting for the right time, but the right time was a list of never ending tomorrows.

On New’s years eve, after outlining my long list of resolutions, I chose to fly out the window and test my wings, but I had no name with which to express my thoughts and tell my stories, the short and long of it all.

After several attempts which did not quite settle with me, since I was in search of something that spoke specifically to me, my Ah ha moment came, whilst preparing a meal for my children and spinning a long tale by moonlight for them. I think a little fairy dropped some gold dust on my ears and whispered: acookingpotandtwistedtales and it simply clicked. For me, my title represents a medley of ideas tossed together to create a patchwork of interesting stuff.

I spend a good portion of my time cooking for my family, and funny enough, I had dabbled into catering business at some point in time in my interesting Topsy-curvy life, so it felt it was quite apt and I think I am going to keep it even though my Title and URL are the same name. Well, who knows, only time will tell what changes would be made.

My tag line had pretty much stayed the same until I joined the blogging university and fire was put under my butt to think out of the box 😉 so in the space of twenty four hours it has changed several times and might even change some more. From “Let’s spin a tale” to “Think. Spin tales: True, False and the Downright absurd”. I am trying to capture the essence of what I want to convey through my blog, which are basically centered around short fictions, my inspirational thoughts, social criticism and rants (when the fancy catches me).

Since it’s not a revolution but an evolution, I will keep tweaking that tag line until I am a hundred percent satisfied.

So, what do you think?

 

Inspiration - Motivation · Musings

Just hold on…

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Providence places some people in our paths for a reason.

In these times that we live in, we meet new people every day,

Not necessarily through the traditional means of meeting people.

The social media, even though it has its downsides,

Has more upsides when it is used in the right manner,

It can serve as a medium of meeting decent people,

And many more advantageous reasons to it as well.

Evaluate your intentions for wanting to connect with other people.

Could it be that you intend to hide behind the impersonal shroud that the sticky web offers?

Or are you willing to take off the mask and let the real you shine through?

In any case, whatever your intents are:

Hold on fast to those friends that you meet and make in your sojourns,

Those friends that make you smile,

Hold on to those friends that make you quake in laughter,

To those friends that make you think twice,

and want to be better than you are,

Hold on to those friends whose wisdom shines through,

Through their sage, twinkly eyes and,

far more than their glinting grey hairs,

Hold on fast to those friends who are in tune with themselves,

Because my friend, it takes a lot to get there.

To friends who can educate you,

Beyond the level that you already know,

Hold on to those friends, with whom you can be the real you,

To those friends who might shake their heads in rebuke,

Because, sometimes even though we don’t like it,

Sometimes, rebuke is a an expression of love.

To those friends who are willing to share from their bounty of wealth,

in their knowledge, in their smiles, in their wisdom, in kind and the likes,

To friends old and new, traditional and modern,

Young in age and old at heart,

Old in age and young at heart,

Just hold on to them all,

Because I tell you my friend, they all have their purpose,

Each and every single one of them.

“The test of friendship is not about those that you have known for ages, but about those who crossed your path and are stuck to your side”.

© Jacqueline Oby-Ikocha

Creative Writing · Social critic

The dance of deceit…

Nigerian dancing

The pulse of the beat emanating from the loudspeakers made even the most gauche and stiff person nod their heads, sway in their seats or tap their feet to the rhythm of music. That was the power of a medley of the latest Naija tunes, which by the way is a staple to guarantee a bubbly party.

The lavish get together at the opulent Oriental hotel was very well attended and the upwardly mobile guests were all dressed to the nines for the occasion. The gentlemen looked dapper in their native outfits and the ladies were a burst of brightness and elegance.

Most of the ladies were either outfitted in slinky dresses that showed off ample bosoms and ankles or were gorgeously bedecked in colorful tailored to fit Lace or Ankara attires, accessorized with all the necessary artillery, from expensive jewelery, to Manolo Blahnik shoes, bling clutches, bank-breaking hair weaves or artfully tied geles/head-ties, which perched on their proud crowns. Their faces were equally perfect canvases of fine artistry and their thick false eyelashes stood inches away from their powder layered skin.

It was a joyful occasion. It was the celebration and dedication of a child born after 14 years of anticipated waiting. A classy and sublime Nigerian party. Champagne and assorted drinks flowed freely without restrictions. Finger licking foods of diverse menu was in surplus rations and  the Master of ceremony occasionally interjected the music with a rib-cracking joke or a little side talk to sweeten the atmosphere.

Yet every moment that passed was like ages spent in a hot seat for Coco. Her intestines were contorted in nerves of pins and needles and she could barely wait for the party to be over so that she would escape to the confines of her home.

“Who invited him here”? She muttered under her breath, sensing some serious mischief on the way, but she was unable to give him his matching orders without drawing unnecessary attention to both of them. It would take one discerning eye to tell. Just one eagle-eyed gossip, who spends more time with her/his nose stuck in other peoples affair. That was all that is required for her life to become a mess.

Another oohing and aahing admiration from a guest drew her attention back to the bundle of joy cradled in her arms. She carelessly caressed the little one’s soft, downy hair, as she listened to yet another analysis of who the baby looked like: whether he looked like her Coco or like Ben.

“My sister, I am happy for you o”, intoned Bisi. “Indeed, God is very faithful o”. “Ah! I was just telling my sister Lola in London, about your testimony o”. “Telling her to have courage and be patient, that he will surely answer in his time o”. “Hmm, your baby is so cute o”. “He is almost as fine as a girl o”. “See all the hair, see the fairness”.

“Your belle is very good o”. “See this fine pikin wey you just born as he yellow, well well, this one no resemble you at all o”. “Maybe na your husband people him resemble”, she carried on her monologue, whilst Coco responded in grunts of appreciation at the same time trying to keep an eye out for the uninvited guest. A good party with lots of liberal drinks had a way of bringing out the pidgin in you.

Soon enough, Simbi glided over to where she sat with the uninvited guest in tow.

“Guess who is in town”? she chirped in her syrupy falsetto. “I ran into him, and we got talking and I told him about your good fortune, I couldn’t help but invite him to come along with me, since I had no one to come with”. She and her husband parted ways, several years ago.

Coco raised her eyes, muttered a cold welcome through clogged throat as she fought an inner battle to keep her face as bland as possible, even though her heart beats were so loud that she thought it could be heard by anyone. Staring into his face catapulted her back to thirteen months and twelve days ago, when she deliberately placed herself in a compromising situation.

She had grown bone weary of being poked and prodded by one gynecologist or the other, subjecting herself to countless fertility tests. Then again, anything to have a baby was worth the while.

She had grown deeply tired of being looked on as useless and her desperation to cradle her own child reached its apogee, when she overheard her sister-in-law insidiously telling her husband that their new home was beautiful, but it was a shame that there were no patters of feet to decorate and warm the house.

She knew that it was a question of time before she would be faced with the challenge of a new wife for Ben, or if she was lucky, he would choose to be discreet and have the children outside with a more fruitful lady.

Every month that her menstrual cycle turned up was like an extra nail on her cross, and a heavy weight on her mind.

Her yearning had left a cavern in her soul. She had cried and sought forgiveness from God for any sin that might be an obstacle in receiving the fruit of the womb. She had danced from one prayer hall to the other. From one night vigil to the other. From one candle lit Pastor to the other, all to no avail.

She had proposed IVF, but Ben found a thousand reasons not to be keen on it.

Adoption was not such a common phenomenon in Nigeria, besides, she needed her husband to buy into such an idea.

The doctors had said that nothing was wrong with her, yet she secretly believed she was at fault. She felt that God was punishing her for all the abortions that she had committed in her youth.

She couldn’t scream from the rooftops or confide in Ben that she was capable of conceiving, based on her numerous pregnancies in the past when she was still single. That would be like a keg of gun powder for a canon!

His silent accusation of ruining her womb will join the turmoil that she was experiencing, thus, her guilt sentenced her to silence.

“Ore, what did the doctor say?” Simbi inquired as they strolled through Balogun market in search of the perfect aso ebi for Stella’s mothers burial.

She and Simbi came a long way from their school days as room mates at University of Ife. They had weathered a whole lot together.

“The same old story o, my sister”. “I have flushed my tubes over and over again, that they must resemble express ways by now”, Coco said wryly.

“If you don’t mind my asking, what of Ben”? Simbi inquired. Daring to venture into that aspect which was sacred and not open for discussion.

“Ben ke”? Coco asked

“Yes now”? “After all it is the two of you that are in this matter”.

“His doctor said nothing is wrong with him o”, Coco reported.

“His doctor”? “Did you two see him together”? Simbi queried, like a dog chewing on a bone.

Coco looked at her friend sharply. “Just what are you saying exactly Simbi”?

“Hmm! Ore, don’t be annoyed o”. “But has he really checked to see that he is okay”? “My dear sister, I remember some things o”. “We both know that you can conceive”.  “I am just saying that you shouldn’t leave these things to chance anymore”. “We are getting old o”. “After forty o, this conception matter gets more difficult”. “This is the time to act”.

“So what is your suggestion?” Coco inquired. “You are speaking in parables”.

“I think you should get him to check again”. “I don’t want you to say tomorrow that I am the devil o, but if it is me, I will try elsewhere, just to see o, Simbi concluded in her matter of fact approach of speaking.

Those little subtle seeds of suggestion took root and festered in Coco’s mind for several moons to pass. She paid serious attention to Ben’s activities and carried out her own private clinical investigations afterwards. It was a shock to find out that he had low sperm count and had probably known that, all these years, but she couldn’t confront him. She could not dare give a voice to her questions. She knew it would bring serious discord which might cost her, her marriage. And since she wanted to stay married, she kept quiet.

In Africa a man can never be impotent. Ha! How can that be? It is always the woman’s fault for failing to be fruitful and to multiply children in triplicates or more copies.

But her vengeful heart knew no peace and other ideas took roots. She reconnected with the uninvited guest on social media and bid her time. He had succeeded in impregnating her in the past, during school days; though he had never been privy to that knowledge. They were just unprepared students. The seduction was timely and complete. Two months later it was a slam dunk. She was pregnant.

Ben had been ecstatic at the news of the forth-coming baby. They went on a shopping spree in London. The baby would have the best that money could buy.

All seemed well and blissful, until Simbi started making some sly and irksome comments.

She no longer felt at ease with her good friend, finding good excuses to keep her at an arms length.

Watching as her friend got down low to the music with him, she contemplated her next possible steps even as she joined her husband on the dance floor for the showers of monetary blessings.

They continued their dance of deceit, but at what cost? Who knows?

© Jacqueline Oby-Ikocha

For some readers who might require the meanings of some of the words for better clarity and understanding, kindly find below:

Also note that we stretch our syllables when we speak and almost always end our sentences with a long drawn ooh when gisting/discussing back home.

Glossary:

Ankara: African prints/fabrics

Aso ebi (pronounced Asho eybee) These refers to Nigerian outfits made from matching fabric to be worn by a group of people to a party, wedding, burial or any other social gathering.

Belle: (pronounced beh-leh) stomach/belly

Gele: traditional Nigerian head wrap made of different textures.

Naija: an acronym or slang as another name for Nigeria, a patriotic name for Nigerians to show union, emotions, strength etc

Ore mi: (pronounced Awe-reh mee) My friend

Pidgin: grammatically simplified form of English

Pikin: (pronounced pee-keen) child

wey you just born: that you delivered

Yellow: refers to very light/fair complexion.

 

Uncategorized

Introducing myself: Blogging 101

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Let’s hope I don’t bore you to death with my ramblings on this assignment of “who I am and why I am here” in the blogosphere.

Jacqueline, the face behind acookingpotandtwistedtales, is a passionate Nigerian woman.

I am a wordsmith (on the cusp of authorship, in my mind at least). I am an entrepreneur, an advocate of truth and moral values, a people’s person, a motivator and a bi-linguist; French/English (also attempting to pick as many languages as I can, even just in their smattering forms).

I am the spouse of an interesting and intelligent gentleman who makes each day in my life spontaneous and devoid of boredom.

I am a mother of children who keep all my faculties engaged (physical and non-physical).

So this is me, an avid reader (not mind reader, unfortunately), an everyday woman with a passion for life and family.

I love to sing in my wobbly voice (who cares), to dance and strut my stuff and to laugh heartily. I love fitness and good nutrition when I can encourage my other lazy self to lace on her training shoes and not to eat all the cake.

I am still a child of Evolution.

I started blogging when I got tired of keeping my thoughts penciled in my journals (I still pencil though). It serves as a voice to some internal thoughts and turmoils. I think in clarity, I recuperate and I exhale when I write. It is therapeutic for me.

I see a story in everything, humorous, serious, life matters, beauty, child rearing or anything that inspires me that we might have in common as humans.

So here I am, exhaling after a long time of staying under water.

If I blog successfully throughout the next year, I would have cultivated the discipline of settling down to write and ramble. I would (hopefully) have finished the drafts of the three novels that I am working on.

Indeed it would be good to arrive at those goals, but I believe that the trip through blogging would be a whole lot of fun.

I look forward to meeting and interacting with other members of this community.

Yours in sincerity,

Jacqueline.