Tag Archive | A New Year and A New Resolution

Life REsolutions…Stream of Consciousness Saturday

I am resolved to stop having any highfalutin new year resolutions but to simply slam the door to an ending year, to open the cover of life each day in the new year and immerse myself fully in its pages.

Of course, I always set goals for myself and I have a backlog of goals that I would love to achieve and working out in my head which new projects to focus on. I’m not ashamed to say that most of those goals are following me from 2017 to 2018. I used to go on a guilt-trip and whip myself hard when I set resolutions and failed to achieve them till I realized that I was doing myself more harm than good. Ever since I started my journey to a better me, my perspective shifted and I’m happier for it.

2017 has been an eventful year for most of us and I am glad that we survived it. ‘Survived’ is the key word here. Life is beautiful, but also unpredictable. I started 2017 on a high note and ended somewhat on ‘meh and bleh’ note, however, it doesn’t take away my enthusiasm that 2018 will be filled with an abundance of grace, blessings and mercy for us.

Here’s to better life (re)solutions and a joy-filled 2018.

On another note, I’ve totally missed writing my SoCS posts, time kept running away with me, but I hope that changes soon enough.

#SoCS Resolutions

Why Our Resolutions Are So Last Season…


We are trying too hard. We are not trying hard enough.

At certain points reminders of where one failed or didn’t get it right pops up.

The usual nag of the annoying voice even sometimes says ‘why bother?’ Since we can’t have what we want instantly; better jobs, excellent health, abs to die for, a wonderful partner, more money, fame, fabulous lifestyles and the whole nine yards – since it is life in the digital century – we feel deflated and defeated.

The inner critic hoots and snickers and smirks at our ambitious attempts to set those 30 years worth of resolutions aright.

But hang on! Just wait a minute. Why the fall backs, the lapses, the frustration, the giving in and giving up, most especially with our New Year resolutions?

I have spent weeks dwelling on the concept of resolution. What it entails and I am sure there is so much to think about, in respect of this concept.

At the on-set, we set off all gung-ho, with sufficient zeal to launch a new float on River Thames, but just before the clock says quarter past on the years calendar, our zeal is at half-mast, deflated or totally gone and negativity sets in. ‘A vicious cycle.’

It dawned on me that the fact of the new way of life, which is the instant gratification of going for something and getting it hot and delivered and with the release of attendant happy endorphin, we drive ourselves round the bend, burning ourselves with the pressure to succeed and when the expected success doesn’t arrive fast enough, the resultant feeling of failure sets in.

Failure is a two way wrench. It either tightens one to push harder to excel, or it deflates one to give in and give up.

I came to understand that the problem lay not in the setting of the goals, but in the perspective of approaches in achieving these set goals. They are seen as something that should be done, dealt with and then we move on to the next acquisition.

However, if we begin to view these goals as lifetime goals to be inculcated and maintained, would our perspectives and approach differ? Would we stick to the plan a wee bit longer and not say, ‘oh well’ I will try and set better resolutions again next year.

We do know that Life does not happen in quarterly allocations but a cumulative result of each day and how we live it.

So, what is it going to be? New Year Resolutions or Lifestyle Solutions?

A striking of balance that stretches over time, or temporal instant gratifications that nose-dive once the spirit flags?

I choose the balanced Lifestyle Solutions that allows for the ebbs and flows of the days of our lives.

DO NOT base your Lifestyle solutions on that tailored for someone else.

That will simply run the copy-cat ragged, especially if the vision pursued is neither yours, nor does it resonate with you.

Taking the time to determine what truly reflects what I want to see in my life, is a journey worth undertaking on a daily, weekly, monthly basis and not just a list of hopeful aspirations which are drawn out on the 31st of December of each year, run after for a few good weeks and then shoved into the cabinet to get moldy or to serve as a nice place for the spiders to weave their web, once the veneer of The New Year wears off.

Here is to better Lifestyle Solutions and a brilliant 2016. Cheers.

‘Blessed are you, awesome people.’

© Jacqueline Oby-Ikocha.