Self Help

Midnight Motivations and Musings #27

jacquelineobyikocha

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When I was much younger, I thought it was possible to please everyone.

Boy! Did I learn a lesson from the school of hard knocks!

Some didn’t like me for reasons best known to them.

Some weren’t sure how they felt about me; their thoughts swinging one way or the other like a pendulum.

Some tried to like me, but I kept falling short of their hi-falutin expectations.

Some out-rightly wanted harm to befall me and actually set about planning harm.

Now, this is the scenario in a whole lot of people’s lives and this transcends from personal to business life as well.

The sad truth is that in a given 100% of people around you, 5 % care about you. 15% Don’t give two hoots and are busy caring about themselves, the other 80% are holding their bated breath and wishing you would drop off planet Earth.

So, if you are preoccupied with the thoughts of what people would say to decide each step you have to take in your life, you need another thinking coming on.

If you are caught up in the act of people pleasing, you will probably run yourself ragged and into the ground trying to fit into every bodies expectations.

That my friend is tantamount to signing away your life.

© Jacqueline Oby-Ikocha

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Published by jacquelineobyikocha

A wordsmith with a vivid imagination, an eager mind and a burning desire to carve out tales. As I journey with my muse to that land of all possibilities and self discovery, I hope my personal evolution will serve as a beacon of inspiration for anyone who chooses to stop by.

49 thoughts on “Midnight Motivations and Musings #27”

  2. I use to struggle with this and in some ways I probably do. But as I get older and listen more to people that love me like my husband and family I could care less what people think about me and my choices in life. It’s so freeing.

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  4. I was bought up on Ella Fitzgerald and her lyric about only being pleasing some of the people some of time struck me. A job frequent job interview question is “do you want to be loved or feared”, my answer is neither.

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  6. ‘What will people think?’ … As I was growing up my mother always used this phrase when I did, or said, something she felt might be taken the wrong way. Unfortunately I absorbed that phrase and worried myself sick over it. It’s taken me a long time to throw it in the bin. Other people will think what they will whatever I do, I know I cannot please everyone. Now I don’t worry about it at all.
    I’m at that age where I’ve grown into myself, I’m comfortable with who I am and my soul is content.

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      1. I can’t quite remember how it’s done, but I would like to suggest that you add your url link to your gravatar. It will definitely help people navigate to your page easily. Regards

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  10. Yes, I agree being a people pleaser is most difficult especially if that is how you are. I had to learn that people can think what they think and you just do the best you can do, and stay out of the ‘drama’. In the office/classroom/ wherever. Great post.

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  11. Amen Sister! That hasn’t been a problem for me in a long time. When those thoughts come to haunt me, I laugh and say “where the heck are my naysayers when I’m in pain or crying? If you don’t care about me, why would I spend any of my energy to care what you think about me?”. That’s what a lot of folks need to remember to repeat in their minds. Blessings sis, Emma xoxoxo Great Post!

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    1. Sis, I love your comments. Where are they when I am in pain and suffering? So why should I expend my energy on what they think about. Good food for thought. I keep forgetting to tell you, can you add your url to your gravatar? I can’t remember how it’s done, but I think it will help people navigate to your blog faster. Blessings and love 🙂

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      2. I added my website link so hopefully you see it now. If not, let me know dear. Thanks again, xo Emma

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  16. Wow, timely, I just had this conversation with my dearest friend……. both agreeing……. that the ones trying to want us to Please them? Are They going to be there to put bread on your table, or pay your electric, or hold your hand. They just want to drive you crazy because you are not Them or their way of doings……my 2.3c worth here 😀 thanks for all your inspiring posts dear neighbor!

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  19. I’ve also discovered in life that you are definitely right about not being able to please everybody. With apologies to Abraham Lincoln, you can please some of the people all of the time, and you can please all of the people some of the time. But you can’t please my ex-boss.

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  22. The Disease To Please is truly a huge problem for so many. The discussion that has followed this great post Jackie is equally interesting. Thank you.

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    1. Thank you JoHanna. It’s a lesson some of us learn over time.
      Let me also use this opportunity to extend an invitation to a bloggers brunch party taking place on my blog on this weekend Sat-Sunday. The post is titled it’s a brunch party. I believe that it will be fun 🙂

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