Left alone…

It’s been ages since I participated in SOC’s and this prompt ‘left alone’ for the stream of consciousness that I just came across made me laugh out loud and sigh as well, as it pretty much sums up my situation at present. Though I have been dodging writing about this situation due to my mixed feelings, but I guess this is my prompt to talk about it.

These past couple of months, we sent off the children to continue their schooling in Canada as college fees in these parts are literally untenable and you need to have heavily lined pockets to afford putting your children through college/university here. For nationals it is freely funded whilst immigrants have to sell some vital organs in order to get their offspring educated in the higher institutions. So, being that my kiddos are Canadian citizens, it’s far more reasonable for them to continue over there, to reacclimatize and to start charting their course in life.

Whilst on one hand I feel relieved that we have this major aspect of things sorted, I feel bereft at being left alone in the interim. I have never been apart from my children and their physical absence leaves the house far too quiet for my liking, that I have taken to leaving the TV on for background noise which is simply out of character for me as I am not much of a TV person.

Thank the Gods of technology that we can make video calls and talk for as long as we want. It helps to take the bite off the ‘flown the coop’ feeling that I keep having, but it is not the same at all. I feel lonesome and I miss being needed. I miss the warm hugs. I miss their squabbles and laughter. I miss the ‘mum I am hungry’ requests. I miss the delight that they express after enjoying a nicely prepared home-made meal. I miss listening to their ideas. I miss my shopping companions. I even miss having the kitchen dirtied up when they try their culinary fingers on one recipe or the other. I miss many things that a list would be endless.

I presume this is a precursor to what it means to be an empty nester and I can categorically state that ‘I don’t like being left alone.’ I look forward to joining my kids in some months down the line and I will savour all the moments spent together.

For those of you who are empty nesters, what are your coping mechanisms?