Unapologetic…

June 10, 2025 jacquelineobyikocha2 Comments

When I was much younger, I was never too comfortable in my own skin. At some point, I felt too tall and lanky and at other points, too busty and whatever not.

Gradually, I learned to do things with false bravado and doing them scared. I worked hard at trying to fit in by shrinking myself just to be liked by others.

My naivety was painful and I ended up being used or abused.

Life is a real teacher and I have long realised that shrinking myself from who I am to who I am not has never been about me, but about those who I struggled to fit into the box they wanted me to be in.

I have long learned that life created you to create a life for yourself and oftentimes, it means relearning how to live and be yourself authentically.

It means taking up space unapologetically without pushing anyone down to do so.

It means that I am enough and not too much. Anyone who thinks that I am too much doesn’t matter and should not belong to those I call my tribe.

My shift in mindset stems from the need to live fully. It emanates from a desire to prioritize self-authenticity and self-respect.

I know that standing my ground, could potentially discomfort others, but I have also come to understand that the right people will accept and celebrate all of me, will not be afraid of my living out loud nor seek to cut me down to manageable size.

The decision to no longer shrink, to take up space came after so many years of self-sabotage. I refuse to be a “background player” in my own life struggling to fit into strictures designed by others.

“A woman in harmony with her spirit is like a river flowing. She goes where she will without pretense and arrives at her destination prepared to be herself and herself only.” Maya Angelou

Musings

Tuesday Thoughts…

March 25, 2025 jacquelineobyikochaLeave a comment

I am on a short break and having a lazy morning. Last night, I had planned on having an early night so that I would wake up with the early bird and go for a walk – getting an early start on my day, but because I was up late nattering away with a friend who had called at night, I went to bed later than planned and my morning didn’t start off as I had wanted.

I could have easily ended the convo, but she was in such a chatty and cheerful mood that I chose to extend the chit-chat. When I woke up this morning, the sun’s rays were already licking my windowpanes that the early morning walk was dead on arrival.

I reshuffled my itinerary – pushing my walk to the later hours of sundown and sat down to attend to other things and to take a measure of my thoughts. I realized I wasn’t feeling so chipper maybe due to sleeping late and whatever but quickly decided that I didn’t want my mood to go south and get funkier.

Instead of mulling over the fact that my itinerary was impacted and a bit askew, I quickly responded to a couple of emails/proposals that if all goes as well as it should, the expected response will definitely put a smile on my face.

As I measured my thoughts, I reinforced these perspectives:

My focus throughout this year is to hold the reins of my thoughts in control as much as is humanly possible, to dwell more on the positives and to quit magnifying the negatives.

My focus is to remind myself of and to appreciate the bridges that I’ve crossed and not the paths where I fell.

My focus is to remind myself that sometimes, a late-night chit-chat adds more flavour to life than an early morning rise and that an evening walk might even pan out better today.

My focus is to be grateful for friends who find time to spend with you, for moments of gratifying laughter and meaningful chit-chats ‘cos as life’s stress mounts, such moments get further far and few in-between.

My focus throughout this year is to keep my energy flow in a high-vibrational frequency so as that my thinking, and feelings are aligned with positivity, love, compassion, and overall well-being. As such, I attract positive experiences and people into my life, and this includes my online experiences.

I eschew all forms of negativity that reduces my frequency and will avoid people who harbour such as they only emit negative emotions and energy, which can lower one’s vibrational frequency. They may have a pessimistic outlook on life, engage in negative habits, and spread negativity to others. Their low vibration affects your spiritual energy which is associated with negative emotions such as persistent feeling of sadness or anger, sluggish thinking, constant fatigue, apathy etc.

On a closing note, whilst partaking in online interactions, avoid those pages that only offer toxic, negative, distressing, gender-biased, dehumanizing posts. Those people are miserable and looking for company. They have nothing better to offer. Be wise ‘cos bad company corrupts good manners.

Inspiration - Motivation · Monday Motivations

Never let yourself go!

March 17, 2025 jacquelineobyikocha7 Comments

It is so easy to fall into a rut especially when life becomes monotonous that you can literally function on autopilot without paying much mind to what you are doing.

Consequently, weeks of functioning like that can lead to dissatisfaction which creeps in and we start feeling that life is a tedium and getting stuck in a rut can be frustrating and demotivating.

Life will seem like a tiresome cycle of chore, responsibilities, bills and expectations. Getting out of this sense of drudgery is seriously essential for our total well-being especially as adults who have a lot of burden to bear.

Every single day, I make conscientious effort to engage in wholesome activities that enhance my sense of purpose, peace and harmony.

I listen to music, I dance, I read, I go for walks, I exercise, I watch movies and comedies, I pray, I think good thoughts. I write, I create. I live in a dream world. I try to do things a bit differently.

Often, I wear vibrant clothes and colors as much as possible. I affirm myself every single day and so on and so forth. Practicing some form of self-care peps up one’s spirit and pulls you out of the doldrums.

What works for me, might not be your cup of tea, nevertheless, here are some strategies to help you avoid getting stuck:

Shake Up Your Routine regularly
Try something new: Engage in a new hobby, activity, or class to challenge yourself and discover new interests.
Change your environment: Rearrange your workspace, take a different route, or travel to a new place to stimulate your mind.
Mix up your social circle: Meet new people, attend events, or join a club to expand your social network.

Set Goals and Challenges
Set SMART goals: Create Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, and Time-bound goals to focus on.
Break tasks into smaller steps: Divide large tasks into manageable chunks to maintain momentum.
Create a challenge for yourself: Set a personal challenge, like running a marathon or learning a new language.

Practice Self-Care
Get enough sleep: Aim for 7-9 hours of sleep to help your brain function at its best.
Exercise regularly: Engage in physical activity to boost your mood and energy levels.
Meditate and practice mindfulness: Take time to relax, focus on the present, and reduce stress.

Seek Inspiration and Support
Read inspiring stories: Explore books, articles, or podcasts that share stories of overcoming obstacles.
Find a mentor or accountability partner: Connect with someone who can offer guidance, support, and motivation.
Join a community or group: Participate in online forums, social media groups, or local meetups to connect with like-minded individuals.

Embrace Failure and Learning
View failure as a learning opportunity: Recognize that mistakes are an essential part of growth and development.
Reflect on your experiences: Take time to analyze what went wrong and how you can improve in the future.
Celebrate small wins: Acknowledge and celebrate your achievements, no matter how small they may seem.

You must remember that life is what we make of it and each day, we owe it to ourselves to make our living worthwhile.

Till next time.

My Thinking Corner

Tuesday Trickles – My Thinking Corner

October 11, 2016 jacquelineobyikocha16 Comments

Every Tuesday, I share snippets of thoughts that I call ‘My Thinking Corner.’

I would like to invite you to participate. The challenge is quite simple. You can check this link for more details.

Keep reminding yourself that you’ve got unlimited potential.

Rejoice in your unlimitedness and know that within and before you lies infinite possibilities in every area.

Our minds are completely connected and serve as a guide to how we shape and reshape our lives and even our bodies to further achieve greater potentials. You can either spend your time griping and begrudging everything that’s not going as it should or you could spend your time expanding your thoughts, thinking about worthwhile experiences.

Loving yourself, living in the moment and dwelling on happy thoughts is the quickest route you can take to create or recreate a wonderful life for yourself.

Bisi shares snippets on how you can keep growing even with your wins and Oba’s wise thoughts on intentional living is worth keeping in mind.

My Thinking Corner

Tuesdays Trickles – My Thinking Corner.

September 27, 2016 jacquelineobyikocha13 Comments

Every Tuesday, I share snippets of thoughts that I call ‘My Thinking Corner.’

I would like to invite you to participate. The challenge is quite simple. You can check this link for more details.

Wishing that you have a different life is simply channeling negative energy into your psyche and that manifests in your life in many conscious and subtle ways that you may not even be aware of.

This is the only opportunity that you get, therefore your priority should be to make the best of it.

We all have things that we failed to get right or ways that our life could have been better if we had made certain choices in the past; well, the truth is that we didn’t make those choices; the truth is that this is the point where we are. Do we continue to look back and whine in our heads, or do we forge ahead, making better choices as we go, knowing that we are getting older and each day that slips by is gone for good?

P.S. We’ll be having our monthly blog party 1st – 2nd of October. I’ll keep you posted.

My Thinking Corner

Tuesdays Trickles…My Thinking Corner #15

March 29, 2016 jacquelineobyikocha22 Comments

Every Tuesday, I share snippets of thoughts that I call ‘My Thinking Corner.’

I would like to invite you to participate. The challenge is quite simple.

Each Tuesday, share your very short snippets of positive, inspiring, motivating, health, spiritual, writing advice, clips, posts etc, that can serve as a prop to motivate others and simply add my link to your post.

I call it my thinking corner because, I actually take out a bit of time just to think through things, encapsulate my thoughts as much as possible and detoxify my mind. It helps give me clarity of vision and might help you too.

It might work for you in a different way, but the idea is to get the positive thoughts flowing.

Please send in your little thoughts. You never know whose life you might inspire.

None of us is less than the first. Whoever decides for him or herself that they are unworthy to be so, has already resigned to settle.

The day our lives begin to be ruled by the strictures of the fear of living is the day we begin to die even while alive.

Our achievements are akin to our love. They both require sacrifice from us.

Running water doesn’t stop when it meets a rock. It finds a way to drip through.

Without any vision, we wander aimlessly and would have no sense of direction. Always tune into your mind to seek for your vision and revisit as often as is required.

Our last week thinkers brought in dollops of good thoughts that I am totally loving 🙂

Words of wisdom If we all think the way Deb does, maybe there’s hope for humankind.

Kindred spirits ‘Let not differences divide us, let not hatred poison us, we are all one.’ Can you say it better than this?

Positive thoughts Here is what I have to say about this inspiring post ‘One thing that I love Annette is your candid expressions without coming across as arrogant. Who said that you can’t teach and old dog new tricks? Call out the person and I will prove him/her wrong. Beautiful post.’

Above from Rosema says it all in six short words.