Weave that Dream

The Pianist…

The beautiful, haunting chords of music floated into the night sky. They gripped my heartstrings with their mesmeric and tranquil melody.

This has become my new opium of choice. I went to sleep and woke up with the tunes on constant replay in my head. My sleep was sound and my dreams were blissful. I had taken to humming the tune unconsciously even as I clattered away rapidly on my word processor at work. I was having a love affair.

I took to sitting on the bench under the Maple tree by the Hudson river walk path, right beneath the line of sight of his apartment window, where I permitted the poignant tale by music to soak into my dry, love parched heart. Even my pooch’s ears always twitched in appreciation.

The dips and high notes told a story of strength, of sadness, enduring love and passion.

I didn’t know who the pianist was, but for several weeks, Bella and I would take our walk down to the bay-side just to listen to the love notes of his talented fingers; his music a balm to my bruised soul.

It happened to me by chance. Falling in love with an unseen stranger.

I had grown bored of my usual walk route, my restless spirit decided to try the less trodden river path.

The depth of feelings which emanated from the music that floated down sounded like a version of Marvin Gaye and Barry White blues rolled into one. It was smoky, dreamy, deep and satisfying. I was hooked. Bella yipped softly along to this pure sound of music, her little tail stuck in the air. We were both lovestruck as silent unbidden tears trickled down my cheeks in throes of undistinguished emotions.

Walking down that path became a ritual. A daily fix like an addict, to fingers that coaxed the piano into giving so much and a deep, rich and sexy voice that caused my stomach muscles to tighten. My yearning to see the face behind these beautiful ministrations grew immensely.

I painted a picture of this elusive enigma and my mind willed him to take a look out of his window.

The window directly overlooked the river – with its constant stream of ferries, yachts, gliders and float planes. I was sure that the view would be awesome.

I felt as if the pianist had cast a spell on me; and that I would awaken from my slumber, thoroughly ravished and looking up into the compelling eyes of my lover. I knew that it was just a matter of time.

Our eyes had finally met, held and connected with a sizzle.

That evening, the air smelled like rain, yet I could not resist the siren call of my pianist.

I knew that he would be playing by now, and would be waiting for his one woman and dog audience. Tonight would be different I felt. So, I dressed in my soft cashmere pink sweater, figure enhancing stretch pants, hair packed in a chignon with a few tendrils left out to create a softer look, a dash of shimmery lip gloss and mascara – no saggy old sweatpants and rumpled tee-shirt; no, not tonight.

His apartment block was a flurry of activity. The flashers of an EMS van and a police car lit up the surroundings. Some people were gathered beside the sidewalk observing the goings-on and discussing in hushed tones as a gurney was loaded into the ambulance.

The unidentified victim was covered from head to toe in a white sheet. My ears strained above the din, to hear the sound of music, but the night was still; it was filled with all other sounds except that thrumming that I had grown to love.

I walked across the pavement, studying the faces as I approached, but none possessed the dark piercing eyes which had stared into mine three nights ago.

What happened? I asked one of the ladies out of curiosity. She turned to look at me with a face that looked pinched and eyes filled with despair.

A young man killed himself, she said. I don’t know him very well, but we have shared the lift occasionally and he was always very polite. It’s not so long ago that he moved in here, she continued.

A young man? I repeated. Which apartment? I asked in quiet fear.

502. She replied – pointing up to that window that I had gazed at intensely for the past few weeks.

I stayed up at night to listen to him play. His music touched me, she said. Sometimes, he played till the early hours of the morning. I wonder what was wrong? Why did he not seek help? She asked rhetorically.

He seemed like a beautiful soul. What a waste of human life! She intoned.They said he took poison and called 911.

A buzz was rushing in my head and her voice voiced wobbly in my ears as if it came from afar through a bull horn.

My heart was screaming its pain into my head. This was not how I envisaged it to end. My love affair had been nipped in the bud before its first blossom.

Tonight, I had felt sure that at last, he would invite me into his warm apartment for a cup of hot chocolate. He would play, I would listen and we would get to know each other.

I mumbled incomprehensibly to the lady; looked up at the apartment window for several minutes and with heavy laden feet, I walked into the night.

The wind had picked up, lifting dead, fallen leaves into the air.

Through the whistling of the swaying pines, I  could hear his melody carrying through the night, through my heart and buried in my soul.

Jacqueline Oby-Ikocha

Inspiration - Motivation · Musings

Perfect? No, not I…

Man

Certainly, I know that I am not perfect,

And that is perfectly alright.

Neither are you, or you and you!

Human flaws are characteristics we all share in common.

Some flaws are deeply entrenched,

Like the mandatory make up stripes on a zebra,

While some flaws are momentarily switched on,

As changeable as a flash bulb.

Some give it a posh title – eccentric, uniqueness, schizophrenic, deficient, myopic …and so on,

Or the simpler names – faults, shortcomings, intolerance, and so on. …

I call it exposing your humanity,

You being who you are.

In each of us, exists a beauty and a beast,

Like a Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde,

It all depends on which side of your humanity you choose to expose.

In each of us exists a redeeming quality,

As minutiae as it may be.

Consider the good qualities of a man,

Weighed against his faulty sides,

And judge his character based on that which outweighs the other.

Let us bear with each other,

For the fault lies in our differences,

And none of us is above such criticism.

Don’t spend too much time dwelling on those flaws,

Life is too short to waste on things that cannot change,

But by all means, change the flashbulbs as often as you can,

For better illumination on the path of your journey,

Your final destination will be worth the effort.

© Jacqueline Oby-Ikocha

Musings

Spring Burst…

With all the troublesome things jumping and nipping at your heels and begging for attention,

When was the last time you unveiled your inner mind to the splendor of nature that surrounds you wherever you are?

Achieving such feat of inner peace may seem far fetched with the constant deluge of horrendous happenings occurring at such rapid pace.

Its almost impossible to keep up and it seems to have our heads spinning in an unending tizzy.

Today has been one of those days. Between the constant alert of anticipated flash flood in neighboring counties and watching the mangled bits and pieces of the derailed Amtrak train; the faces of loss, pain and grief; I had to pause to ask myself..

If this were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am doing now?

What matters most in my life?

Am I holding on to somethings that I should let go of right now?

What am I doing about those things that matter most in my life?

Thus continued the nagging questions in my mind, with no immediate answers at hand.

I mute the television, I take a peek out of the window, I lace up my dirty sneakers and I walk to my favorite park.

The weather is mild and airy. The Earth still wet from the sprinkles of rain shower, which clung to plant leaves and flower petals like a lover reluctant to let go.

Taking those springy steps and inhaling deeply of the fresh earthy smell which is given off by the rain, I try to reconnect with the inner me. I think its a time just to be.

The park maintenance staff are quite engaged, replanting, mowing the grass, pruning and trimming the overgrown shrubbery.

The beautiful arrays of blooming flowers are indeed a good sight to cheer up a dampened spirit.

The fragrant mixed blend of fresh cut shrubs, of flowers and turned wet soil assailed my nostrils in a very pleasant manner.

I chat randomly with one of the workers, asking some questions about the plants. He was very willing to part with his knowledge at a little cost of a simple hello.

I decided there and then to try my hands at gardening. Who knows? I might turn out to have green fingers. Besides, I hear that there is something refreshing about nurturing a plant and seeing it grow.

I see the cautious old lady and her little dog. She offered a smile as we cross each other on the second turn across the park.

I take note of the much older gentleman who slowly sprints past me; I must be as slow as a slug,

I watch the squirrels darting back and forth in careless abandon,

I observe firsthand a bird fighting a poor squiggly earthworm to the finish,

I listen briefly as I pass a young mother pushing her little ones in a double buggy, she was humming a tune,

A sliver of sun breaks through the clouds, as I make my way back to the house,

Its a good day, I said to myself.

I am just happy to be.

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Tree Top..

If the tree could speak, what would it whisper, I ask?

Would it utter sweet words of comfort to the birds that nest’s in the shadows of its branches?

Would it chuckle at the antics of little furry friends who keep it company, scurrying and swinging from one limb to other?

Would it weep in utter despair at the reapers who harvest from its bounty of logs leaving no spares?

Will it gnash its gnarly vines and branches in utmost arrogance at those who strips it bare of its bark, exposing her to the

frigid elements or furnaces of hot rod melting degrees?

Would it look down in fondness on the young child swaying in a handcrafted swing tied to its boughs?

Will it welcome a tree house with the young boy and his friends who have found a resting place on its branches;

Listening in to their boyish dreams, adventures and antics, whilst swaying in agreement or caution?

Would it be benevolent to nimble ones, who brace its sturdy gait in search of succulent fresh produce?

Would it willingly offer its shady tops to the worn out laborer?

Or the secret lovers who meet under its shadows for a little tête-à-tête?

If a tree could speak…….

Tell me my friend, what do you hear?

Jacqueline Oby-Ikocha

Fiction · Short story

Blindsided…

At last there was eerie calm. The heated tussle was over. She clutched the bloodied, sharp butcher knife, her hands totally saturated in blood, which trickled down the cracks of her fingers in rivulets and dripped all over the floor.

In the frenzy of the struggle, the blood had splattered everywhere, including the walls. She was surprised at the amount of blood which had pooled on the floor. Indeed, it would require a thorough clean up, if not the stains will become affixed and she would hate such constant reminders.

Hissing in pain, she turned on the kitchen tap which simply sputtered, coughed up a few drops of water and ceased. Wishful thinking she said to herself. This night is just going nicely. Stomping out of her back door, she fetched a bowl of water from one of the  jerrycans of water that they purchased from the roaming water vendors and tried to wash her hands to staunch the flow of blood from the cut on her left index finger. Her upper arms had criss-crossed scratch marks. She mentally reminds herself to wear Iro and Buba for the next couple of days to ward off unnecessary inquisition.

Walking over to where he was sprawled haphazardly, she took several minutes to eye him in disdain and  then went about the distasteful business of dissecting the remains in a meticulous surgical approach .

Hacking away at the body parts in small bits to make it easier to handle, every cut of flesh and squirt of blood forced the bile to rise in her throat but she tampered her desire to vomit and performed the odious act calmly. Some of these bones will require the cutlass to break them, she muttered to herself.

Her emotions were a mingle of sorrow, satisfaction, bitterness and anger which simmered inside her like a cauldron on a slow cook.

When did it come to this, Agnes wondered?

Heh! Nobody told me that this is how this marriage thing would be, she shrieked silently in her mind.

She had been totally blindsided with the unreasonable expectations.

She had wanted a clean break, an opportunity to start afresh, but no! He would have none of that talk!

He had to intimidate her into submission and silence. Just last week was their second anniversary and the stingy man couldn’t even buy me anything, yet he shamelessly collected the jersey of his favorite football club that I bought.

How did I rope myself into this slavery, she pondered?

Was this how others felt out there as well?

Were they driven to murderous tendencies yet had false smiles plastered on their lips to distract observations from the pain behind their eyes, until the dam burst and all hell broke loose?

I have always been afraid that one day, if this man does not kill me, I will kill him!

Using a big black disposable bag, she packed up all traces of her killing, moped up the blood as much as she could and prepared all the stuff that she felt she needed.

In deed, it had been a long, hectic day of nightmarish proportions. Dragging the refuse bags that she had accumulated, she took the less used winding back staircase, walked down the dusky, silent street to the communal refuse dump and disposed the bags.

Now, finally I can rest, she exhaled and quickly went back to her house. She was in no mood to encounter any nosy neighbor.

The pot was ready. Dishing a generous portion in his favorite serving bowl, she took it to the dinning.

He was still sprawled lackadaisically on the sofa, his slackened fingers had let go of the remote that he was clutching.

Linus, Linus, the Pepper soup is ready! She shook him harshly, in an attempt to wake him up from his snoring snooze.

Once he opened his bleary eyes, and made his way to the dinning, she served him his meal albeit grudgingly. She was too tired to eat.

Hissing yet again and mumbling under her breath as she wearily dragged herself to bed, she hoped that the hot spicy turkey pepper soup will scald his tongue.

What is the World coming to, she queried rhetorically? Back in the days when I was growing up, the men killed and carved the birds and animals whilst the women did the cooking.

This lazy man couldn’t even kill a Turkey and had sat in oblivious contentment whilst the stubborn bird gave me such a hard time!

She marveled at how a bird that it’s head was almost decapitated still managed to trash and jump around so much, causing a lot of havoc in her kitchen, a reluctant chuckle escaped her mouth when she recollected the run around that the big bird had given her.

Who knows? Maybe, one of these days, he will expect me to slaughter a cow.

Jacqueline Oby-Ikocha

Glossary:

Iro and Buba: Nigerian native wear, worn by women as wrapper and a top with very long, loose sleeves.

Pepper Soup: Hot, spicy soup made with meat,

Humor - Bellyful of laughter

A Silly Tune

Sometime in the month of June

I met a lad called Fortune

He played quite a fine tune

Which made me to swoon

Alas! Now I am due at noon

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The Journey

Olanna would not let the attitude of the obnoxious immigration officer get to her. Her excitement was brimming over and in her state of joy, she did not mind parting with the cedis that she had left on her; she did not think that she would be needing them very soon.

Passage through the Lagos-Badagry border was known to be stressful and she couldn’t wait for the clearance of customs and immigration controls to be done so that they can continue their journey. The seven plus hours form Accra to Lagos had been hectic but was gradually coming to an end.

The bus had trundled assuredly through the West African International road route, only stopping for short breaks, to refuel, and for border control between Togo and Ghana, but through the entire trip, she seemed to be floating in a bubble of good tidings, flipping through various copies of bridal magazines that she had purchased in Accra.

She daydreamed of her wedding which she felt sure would take place in a couple of months and was finding it difficult to settle on the style of gown that she would like to wear on her big day.

Should I have a ring bearer, a flower girl and ladies-in-waiting she mused?

Should it be an intimate wedding of just close family and friends or should I allow Mama to have her way and invite all and  sundry as she is bound to do once I announce the forthcoming nuptials?

The should I’s were numerous but she had a firm belief that Philip would be happy to go along with her choices. He always wanted her happiness, which was why he supported her trips to the West Coast to purchase fabrics for her business.

This good news will definitely prompt a long awaited romantic proposal. After so many years of searching for employment, securing a stable job in a top oil and gas company would be a welcome change from the hustle of her budding fashion business. Sometimes the hassles were so much that she wondered if the gains were worth the trouble.

Not allowing any negative thoughts to form in her mind, she opened her bag and extracted the slip of paper which she looked at so lovingly.

So engrossed was she in her thoughts that the last few hours spent crawling through Lagos traffic passed blissfully and in no time she alighted the bus stop at Ojuelegba.

She hailed a taxi and after some back and forth haggling over price, they settled on an agreeable figure and the driver sped off to Philips house.  She couldn’t wait to see the surprise on his face when he comes home and finds her.

He expected her back on Monday, but her news precipitated a shorter trip.

Madam, we don reach Eric Moore flats o, the driver alerted her.

Ah! Okay. Just move small and stop behind that car over there, she instructed.

It was now dark and the drone of all the generators from the different apartments made an already balmy evening a notch warmer. She paused when she saw Philips Nissan Altima parked in its usual space. Based on their conversation, she thought he was meant to be on call at the clinic till late evening.

No matter! She thought to herself. He will still be pleasantly surprised to see me and best of all when I share my news with him, I bet we wont sleep this night out of excitement. Smiling to herself, she tiredly climbed the several flight of stairs to his apartment.

Taking her copy of the entrance key; which she had managed to obtain after a lot of cajoling, she let herself into the place she was growing to call home.

The light from the plasma TV which was on, provided the only illumination in the living room and music was floating down the hallways from the direction of the bedroom. It was welcoming.

Slipping off her heeled sandals in order not to alert him, she tiptoed over to his room.

The husky incoherent whisper filtering through the crack of the doorway caused her to falter for a brief moment. However, her curiosity got the better of her, thus with a thudding heart and sweaty palms, she pushed open the bedroom door.

An involuntary gasp escaped her lips as she stood transfixed, trying to assimilate the surreal display in front of her.

She gazed in amazement as her Philip, the man of her dreams, her future husband and the father of the unborn baby nestled in her womb was speaking gibberish whilst an unknown man was crouched over him in flagrante delicto. She literally felt her heart shattering painfully into little bits.

The squeak of the opened door had attracted Philips attention and glancing over his shoulders, he saw Olanna, his girlfriend of four years and five months rooted in the doorway in a state of shock.

The interlude had been rudely interrupted and as he shrugged off his sexual partner in order to pull something on, Olanna whirled on her bare heels and rushed out of the apartment; hot tears cascading down her cheeks.

Blindly, she rushed down the stairs, missing a step in her hurry.

Her body lurched forward in a drunken stance, spilling down the concrete steps with thuds and bumps until it finally came to rest on the landing. Her broken body at an odd twisted angle.

Jacqueline Oby-Ikocha

Uncategorized

Snippet of Faith

Call me an eavesdropper; and yes, you just might be right.
I love to people watch and listen to random conversations of total strangers.
I simply find the ebb and flow of human voices a comfort and sometimes an abstract diversion from
a heavier thought process which can tend to clog one’s mind at times.
So! I keep my ears open; listen in, with as little intrusion as possible, and the snippets of
shared chit-chat and views paints a far more vivid picture in my mind, adding or detracting from the
vibrancy of the persons physical appearance.
This brings me to the little conversation I overheard yesterday in a beauty supply shop.
I had finished picking the few items that I needed and headed to the counter to pay. There was a little
queue of women and I took my position on the line of the second counter.
A senior Asian lady of undetermined age at the start of the second queue seemed unsure of her
choices and was taking some time to ask the cashier a thousand and one questions.
I must confess, the little impatient imp in me got a bit irritated and I rolled my eyes in exasperation
wondering why she would choose to make everybody wait whilst carrying out a pre-purchase
survey.
As this went on for several minutes, the ladies in front of me chose to move to the other
counter which was flowing pretty well. I was now directly behind the lady (out of my own choice)
and thus, became a willing eavesdropper and observer.

If I had been asked to place her age, I would have put her age bracket around mid-fifties. She was quite compact without any excess pounds sitting on her slight frame. Her short halo of hair was colored a rich auburn though the greying
roots were showing. She was dressed in a black Capri pants, paired with a cotton floral top and black ballet flats. She looked
well put together and did not have the appearance of someone who was unsure of herself.

And so they carried on with their conversation:
The lady: Are you recommending this shampoo, conditioner and coloring product based on
customers experience or as a personal preference, she asked in her nicely accented English?

The Store Attendant: Well Ma’am, I have used these myself and they turned out okay, she
responded, in a tone laced with resignation.

The lady: You know, I am worried that my hair will start falling soon, so I am being a bit more
careful with what I use these days, she said.

Well, that statement drew my eyes back to her hair, and rightly said, they were thinning right in the
middle.

The Store Attendant: We have multivitamins that help with hair growth, I can show you
some of those if you like, she inquired?

The lady: I can’t take any form of medication or vitamins without consulting my doctor, I
have cancer, she declared in a very subdued tone.

My heart sank for this lady whom I did not know and would probably never see again and I flash
back to two years ago, when we lost my dad to the dreaded C.

At this point, I couldn’t help but join the exchange.
Excuse me Ma, if you don’t mind my asking, how old are you?
The lady: Sixty-six years she said.
Me: Wow! Sixty-six I exclaimed! I had placed you ten years younger. You look really good for your
age and if you had not said so, no one would have guessed that you are struggling with such a
burden. How have you managed to keep yourself from falling apart or giving in to the “Why me”
victim mentality, I inquired?
The lady: My faith she said. Even my doctor is surprised. I have another round of chemo next week
and I want to tidy up myself before then. It tends to make me very tired afterwards. I just wanted to try
something different whilst I still have my hair. It’s either I choose to let go or I choose to Let God and
since I choose to Let God, somehow I find the strength to go on with my normal life.
I nodded in agreement. I could only try to imagine what she must be going through based on
my own experience with my dad and if a new hair look will perk up her spirits, then, why not indulge
for as long as she can?
Me: You know Ma’am, these days so many people would question your upbeat attitude in
the face of your adversity and they will be hasty in telling you that God does not exist and if indeed
he does exist, why does he allow bad things to happen to people?
In that calm, accented voice that I found interesting, she stated: I rather live a simple life as right as I can
with faith that there is God, than a life filled with splendor but without faith in God.
With all that said, she paid for her items, I paid for mine and we both left the store.

I wished her well and continued to my car. For several minutes, I sat there mulling over her words. Could faith
really play a huge role in our attitude towards challenges that come our way? Is there any
correlation between faith, healing and success?

I do not have all the answers, but I choose to have just a “snippet of faith”.

Jacqueline Oby-Ikocha

Weave that Dream

Who we are..

Whatever we see,

Wherever we go,

Whatever we pass through in the journey of life,

Passes through us, leaving indelible etchings

On our hearts, minds and body

No matter how big or small

Until our entire being

Becomes a transfiguration of the multitude of etchings

Which forms our intrinsic being.

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Now, why did I start this blog I ask myself? Just to share my quirky tales and thoughts as well as get to know yours. It’s not all ironed out yet, but what is life without a few wrinkles, I ask? So lets hobble along, tell some tales, read some minds, drink some wine and have some fun. Who knows? We just might end up making a perfect medley of this and that!